Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Nigerian

Western-style church weddings with white dresses for the brides are the norm in Nigeria, according to Okey Chigbo, associate editor of the magazine Equinox in Toronto, Ontario. Born and raised in Nigeria but now living in Canada, Chigbo was married in Canada to his Trinidadian bride in a short civil ceremony held in a hotel suite, with vows written by the couple. "Chances are that if you were invited to a wedding in southern Nigeria today," he says, "it would likely be a Western-style wedding, usually with a church ceremony and a reception afterward."

The influence of the church in Nigeria, Chigbo explains, occurred because "by about 1910, virtually all of the Igbo land (Eastern Nigeria) was conquered by the British and there were missionaries before that. The Igbo people, united by more or less a common language as far back as the turn of the century, was made up of a number of different tribes." Among the Igbo, there is "no real corresponding wedding ceremony per se." A wedding, traditionally, was a long, drawn-out process that could take up to a year, not just a day or even two weeks. It was like a courtship between families rather than between the male and female.

According to Chigbo, the following process would take place, although it could differ slightly from tribe to tribe. The groom's family would thoroughly investigate the bride's family and vice versa. For instance, questions would be asked regarding the girl's behavior and whether she would make a good wife. The most significant part of the year-long process was the visits. "The family of the groom would visit the family of the bride to notify them of the intention." The groom's family would visit with lots of mmanya, a type of wine. During this procedure, called "the carrying of the wine," there would be libations, and the ancestors would be called on to bless the union. On the occasion of the groom's family's second visit, "the bride would be called into the room to see whether she wanted to marry him," says Chigbo. "In theory, she's allowed to turn him down. After a number of visits back and forth, during one of the visits, the groom's family gives gifts to the bride's family. It could be cows, yams, bags of money. After the gift is received, the bride goes to the groom's family to spend time ­ one to three months ­ with them to see if they're compatible. If everyone feels she's compatible, the wedding feast is held for family and friends, and could consist of pounded yams, soups, and wonderful meats; there is no word for "dessert" in the Igbo vocabulary. After the feast, the bride goes to her husband's home. In the Igbo community, when a woman goes to the husband's house, she's considered married to the family and she's referred to as nwuye anyi, which means 'our wife.'"