Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Sikh

Sikhism, a religious sect founded in Northern India in the early 1500s as an offshoot of Hinduism, teaches the belief in only one deity
and rejects the caste system.

When attending a Sikh wedding, there are certain points of etiquette to keep in mind, according to Neetu Thakar, a Sikh acquaintance of mine who now lives in Toronto, Ontario, but was born and married in India. In terms of dress code for the guests, she says the preference is traditional costume. If that is not possible, then women should wear long skirts ("no short skirts or jeans"), preferably in dark, vibrant colors such as red or purple. Avoid wearing plain white cloth because white is considered unlucky; any flashes of white should be from embroidery or beading. Jewelry adornment is strongly encouraged. To enter the place of worship, both men and women should be wearing a head covering. Also, they must remove their shoes at the door because no leather, explains Thakar, must be brought inside, although purses are acceptable. When deciding on wardrobe, guests should keep in mind that during the ceremony, which can last about 1 1/2 hours, they will be sitting on the floor in the temple; there will be no cushions.

On the morning of the wedding, the bride will arrive at the temple after having been elaborately dressed and adorned with makeup and jewels by her female relatives. The day before, she would have had her hands and
legs painted with henna designs.

At the ceremony, the husband will be seated and then the bride's mother and the bride's best friend will escort her to her seat, with the bride and groom sitting facing both the pathi (the man who reads the holy book) and the holy book. After the couple is seated, the bride's mother will place one end of a special pink cloth in the bride's hand and the other on the groom's shoulder. The ritual involves the bride's mother taking the pink cloth, which is part of the groom's outfit, and tying it to part of the bride's headpiece ­ literally, tying the knot and symbolizing the strength of joining two things together. There are readings about marriage and the duties of the couple. Promises are exchanged. The couple walks around the holy book four times, with the husband leading, and both of them holding on to the pink cloth to signify walking together. After each circle, the bride and groom kneel and bow toward the holy book. After the fourth time around, the wedding is completed. Then the couple sits down together.

At this point, the parents and grandparents stand up. The pathi addresses them regarding their roles in supporting the couple.

When the ceremony is over, all the guests go up to the front to congratulate the couple. Some guests may place a hand on the head of the bride and groom, like a blessing. Another tradition at this point, although technically optional for the guests, is to place a token amount of money (e.g., $2, $5, $10, whatever the guest can afford) into the pink cloth held by the bride and groom.