As a result of the influence of the Spanish missionaries, many Native Southwest American weddings these days are held in missions with
chapels or in Catholic churches.
For traditional weddings, along with the extended families of the bride and groom, the community gathers together with an officiating elder at the center. Decorative baskets holding corn (a fertility symbol as well as a traditional food) are presented to the couple. Both Navajo and Paiute weavers create willow wedding baskets to hold cornmeal for blessings or prayers; the opening of the ceremonial basket is always directed toward the east, a sacred direction from which no harm is supposed to pass. The Navajo family system is traditionally matrilinear, so, in the past, when a man married, he went to live with his wife and her parents.
The use of the double-spouted pottery wedding vessel may be a relatively recent addition to the traditional ceremony. In Pueblo wedding ceremonies, one spout of the vase represents the husband while the other represents the wife, with the looped handle symbolizing the unity that is achieved with marriage. In a traditional ceremony, to help consummate the marriage, the Pueblos would drink a nectar from either spout.
The Native American Church, a continuation of the ancient Peyote religion which used peyote, a cactus with psychedelic properties, combines Christian beliefs with the peyote sacrament. Peyote, with mescaline as its main active ingredient, is viewed by the church as the manner through which members can commune with the divinity. During a wedding, drums containing peyote tea are banged on, and then the tea is drunk. Some worshippers shake rattles that are shaped like peyote buttons. Congregation members ingest crushed grains of peyote.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Nigerian
Western-style church weddings with white dresses for the brides are the norm in Nigeria, according to Okey Chigbo, associate editor of the magazine Equinox in Toronto, Ontario. Born and raised in Nigeria but now living in Canada, Chigbo was married in Canada to his Trinidadian bride in a short civil ceremony held in a hotel suite, with vows written by the couple. "Chances are that if you were invited to a wedding in southern Nigeria today," he says, "it would likely be a Western-style wedding, usually with a church ceremony and a reception afterward."
The influence of the church in Nigeria, Chigbo explains, occurred because "by about 1910, virtually all of the Igbo land (Eastern Nigeria) was conquered by the British and there were missionaries before that. The Igbo people, united by more or less a common language as far back as the turn of the century, was made up of a number of different tribes." Among the Igbo, there is "no real corresponding wedding ceremony per se." A wedding, traditionally, was a long, drawn-out process that could take up to a year, not just a day or even two weeks. It was like a courtship between families rather than between the male and female.
According to Chigbo, the following process would take place, although it could differ slightly from tribe to tribe. The groom's family would thoroughly investigate the bride's family and vice versa. For instance, questions would be asked regarding the girl's behavior and whether she would make a good wife. The most significant part of the year-long process was the visits. "The family of the groom would visit the family of the bride to notify them of the intention." The groom's family would visit with lots of mmanya, a type of wine. During this procedure, called "the carrying of the wine," there would be libations, and the ancestors would be called on to bless the union. On the occasion of the groom's family's second visit, "the bride would be called into the room to see whether she wanted to marry him," says Chigbo. "In theory, she's allowed to turn him down. After a number of visits back and forth, during one of the visits, the groom's family gives gifts to the bride's family. It could be cows, yams, bags of money. After the gift is received, the bride goes to the groom's family to spend time one to three months with them to see if they're compatible. If everyone feels she's compatible, the wedding feast is held for family and friends, and could consist of pounded yams, soups, and wonderful meats; there is no word for "dessert" in the Igbo vocabulary. After the feast, the bride goes to her husband's home. In the Igbo community, when a woman goes to the husband's house, she's considered married to the family and she's referred to as nwuye anyi, which means 'our wife.'"
The influence of the church in Nigeria, Chigbo explains, occurred because "by about 1910, virtually all of the Igbo land (Eastern Nigeria) was conquered by the British and there were missionaries before that. The Igbo people, united by more or less a common language as far back as the turn of the century, was made up of a number of different tribes." Among the Igbo, there is "no real corresponding wedding ceremony per se." A wedding, traditionally, was a long, drawn-out process that could take up to a year, not just a day or even two weeks. It was like a courtship between families rather than between the male and female.
According to Chigbo, the following process would take place, although it could differ slightly from tribe to tribe. The groom's family would thoroughly investigate the bride's family and vice versa. For instance, questions would be asked regarding the girl's behavior and whether she would make a good wife. The most significant part of the year-long process was the visits. "The family of the groom would visit the family of the bride to notify them of the intention." The groom's family would visit with lots of mmanya, a type of wine. During this procedure, called "the carrying of the wine," there would be libations, and the ancestors would be called on to bless the union. On the occasion of the groom's family's second visit, "the bride would be called into the room to see whether she wanted to marry him," says Chigbo. "In theory, she's allowed to turn him down. After a number of visits back and forth, during one of the visits, the groom's family gives gifts to the bride's family. It could be cows, yams, bags of money. After the gift is received, the bride goes to the groom's family to spend time one to three months with them to see if they're compatible. If everyone feels she's compatible, the wedding feast is held for family and friends, and could consist of pounded yams, soups, and wonderful meats; there is no word for "dessert" in the Igbo vocabulary. After the feast, the bride goes to her husband's home. In the Igbo community, when a woman goes to the husband's house, she's considered married to the family and she's referred to as nwuye anyi, which means 'our wife.'"
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Native Indian: Northeast North American
As a result of the influence of the Spanish missionaries, many Native Southwest American weddings these days are held in missions with
chapels or in Catholic churches.
For traditional weddings, along with the extended families of the bride and groom, the community gathers together with an officiating elder at the center. Decorative baskets holding corn (a fertility symbol as well as a traditional food) are presented to the couple. Both Navajo and Paiute weavers create willow wedding baskets to hold cornmeal for blessings or prayers; the opening of the ceremonial basket is always directed toward the east, a sacred direction from which no harm is supposed to pass. The Navajo family system is traditionally matrilinear, so, in the past, when a man married, he went to live with his wife and her parents.
The use of the double-spouted pottery wedding vessel may be a relatively recent addition to the traditional ceremony. In Pueblo wedding ceremonies, one spout of the vase represents the husband while the other represents the wife, with the looped handle symbolizing the unity that is achieved with marriage. In a traditional ceremony, to help consummate the marriage, the Pueblos would drink a nectar from either spout.
The Native American Church, a continuation of the ancient Peyote religion which used peyote, a cactus with psychedelic properties, combines Christian beliefs with the peyote sacrament. Peyote, with mescaline as its main active ingredient, is viewed by the church as the manner through which members can commune with the divinity. During a wedding, drums containing peyote tea are banged on, and then the tea is drunk. Some worshippers shake rattles that are shaped like peyote buttons. Congregation members ingest crushed grains of peyote.
chapels or in Catholic churches.
For traditional weddings, along with the extended families of the bride and groom, the community gathers together with an officiating elder at the center. Decorative baskets holding corn (a fertility symbol as well as a traditional food) are presented to the couple. Both Navajo and Paiute weavers create willow wedding baskets to hold cornmeal for blessings or prayers; the opening of the ceremonial basket is always directed toward the east, a sacred direction from which no harm is supposed to pass. The Navajo family system is traditionally matrilinear, so, in the past, when a man married, he went to live with his wife and her parents.
The use of the double-spouted pottery wedding vessel may be a relatively recent addition to the traditional ceremony. In Pueblo wedding ceremonies, one spout of the vase represents the husband while the other represents the wife, with the looped handle symbolizing the unity that is achieved with marriage. In a traditional ceremony, to help consummate the marriage, the Pueblos would drink a nectar from either spout.
The Native American Church, a continuation of the ancient Peyote religion which used peyote, a cactus with psychedelic properties, combines Christian beliefs with the peyote sacrament. Peyote, with mescaline as its main active ingredient, is viewed by the church as the manner through which members can commune with the divinity. During a wedding, drums containing peyote tea are banged on, and then the tea is drunk. Some worshippers shake rattles that are shaped like peyote buttons. Congregation members ingest crushed grains of peyote.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Muslim
"Followers of Islam adhere to a religion that is worldwide, so that although the basic format of the wedding ceremony is the same, there will be differences among the different cultures," says Haroon Salamat, chairman of Toronto and Region Islamic Congregation (TARIC).
Here are some important points to help in understanding the service. The offer of marriage comes from the female, usually through her father or another male relative. There must be no collusion; the couple must agree to marry of their own free will. Muslim women must marry Muslim men; however, Muslim men may marry non-Muslim women, but their children must be raised Muslim. After accepting an offer of marriage, a groom will give his bride a mahr, a gift. It can be property, a home, jewelry, or even something such as education. (In cases where the groom's family is not very well off financially, the groom, who may be better educated than the bride, may give the gift of literacy, offering to teach his bride how to read and write to help improve her lot.) Unless the marriage breaks up before the wedding is consummated or only lasts a very short time, the gift remains the bride's and she can use it as she pleases.
At the wedding, the bride and groom are separated, either in different parts of the hall or in different rooms. They may or may not be able to see each other. Guests are also separated by gender, although in some Western cultures, the groups may be mixed. The wali, the bride's representative, comes forward for the ceremony. He will answer for the bride when questioned by the officiator. The groom, representing himself, also joins the wali and the officiator. At the ceremony, "once the proposal has been accepted and the gift has been agreed upon and the person overseeing the ceremony believes the couple are marrying of their own will, he pronounces them man and wife," says Salamat. "It takes about five minutes. The basic ceremony is very simple." Any Muslim who understands the traditions of Islam may perform the ceremony, although many mosques have marriage officers who can oversee marriages on behalf of the province/state. "The most important thing for a Muslim is to be married in the eyes of God."
Congratulating the bride or groom with a kiss on the cheek after the service may be frowned upon, although that, too, may be changing in some Western cultures. Take cues from the guests who are more familiar with the culture.
Here are some important points to help in understanding the service. The offer of marriage comes from the female, usually through her father or another male relative. There must be no collusion; the couple must agree to marry of their own free will. Muslim women must marry Muslim men; however, Muslim men may marry non-Muslim women, but their children must be raised Muslim. After accepting an offer of marriage, a groom will give his bride a mahr, a gift. It can be property, a home, jewelry, or even something such as education. (In cases where the groom's family is not very well off financially, the groom, who may be better educated than the bride, may give the gift of literacy, offering to teach his bride how to read and write to help improve her lot.) Unless the marriage breaks up before the wedding is consummated or only lasts a very short time, the gift remains the bride's and she can use it as she pleases.
At the wedding, the bride and groom are separated, either in different parts of the hall or in different rooms. They may or may not be able to see each other. Guests are also separated by gender, although in some Western cultures, the groups may be mixed. The wali, the bride's representative, comes forward for the ceremony. He will answer for the bride when questioned by the officiator. The groom, representing himself, also joins the wali and the officiator. At the ceremony, "once the proposal has been accepted and the gift has been agreed upon and the person overseeing the ceremony believes the couple are marrying of their own will, he pronounces them man and wife," says Salamat. "It takes about five minutes. The basic ceremony is very simple." Any Muslim who understands the traditions of Islam may perform the ceremony, although many mosques have marriage officers who can oversee marriages on behalf of the province/state. "The most important thing for a Muslim is to be married in the eyes of God."
Congratulating the bride or groom with a kiss on the cheek after the service may be frowned upon, although that, too, may be changing in some Western cultures. Take cues from the guests who are more familiar with the culture.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Mormon
There are basically two kinds of Mormon wedding ceremonies: the temple ceremony and the chapel ceremony. The former, performed by an official of the temple, is reserved for "active members of the Church who adhere to certain standards," says Bishop Glenn Pruden of the Hamilton First Ward, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Hamilton, Ontario. He says that in Canada, there are only two temples: one, built around 1920, in Cardston, Alberta, and another, built in 1990, in Toronto, Ontario. "When the Mormon pioneers settled into the Salt Lake Valley area in 1847, following that (1847 to 1880s), groups of pioneers were sent out to colonize in the intermountain west area (Arizona, Idaho, Nevada, and Utah) and the southern tip of Alberta and the northern tip of Mexico."
The temple ceremony is fairly simple. "At the temple, we believe that the couple is sealed together 'for time and all eternity.'" Bishop Pruden explains that according to the Mormon Church, the members are not allowed to discuss the actual ceremony from a temple service because it is considered sacred.
The restrictions, however, do not apply to a chapel ceremony. "In a chapel service, it would be very similar to one that would be conducted in a Protestant church," he says. While the ceremony may be formal in the sense that the bride may wear a white dress, the groom a suit, and the guests their Sunday best, the service "is usually organized on a less ceremonious basis than that of the High Anglican, Roman Catholic, or Greek Orthodox service." For instance, there would be a wedding march, but a simplified one. The organist would play a prelude to the ceremony. The officiator, usually the bishop (similar to a "minister" in the Protestant service) of the ward (or "congregation" in the Protestant service), or the president of the stake (similar to a "diocese"; usually 10 to 12 wards in a stake) would conduct the service. The entrance of the wedding party would be similar to that in the Protestant ceremony. The service may include an opening prayer from the bishop, a musical number, a short speech from the bishop about marriage, then the vows, the exchange of rings (not mandatory, but it usually takes place), and the signing of the register. This entire process may last just 15 to 20 minutes.
The temple ceremony is fairly simple. "At the temple, we believe that the couple is sealed together 'for time and all eternity.'" Bishop Pruden explains that according to the Mormon Church, the members are not allowed to discuss the actual ceremony from a temple service because it is considered sacred.
The restrictions, however, do not apply to a chapel ceremony. "In a chapel service, it would be very similar to one that would be conducted in a Protestant church," he says. While the ceremony may be formal in the sense that the bride may wear a white dress, the groom a suit, and the guests their Sunday best, the service "is usually organized on a less ceremonious basis than that of the High Anglican, Roman Catholic, or Greek Orthodox service." For instance, there would be a wedding march, but a simplified one. The organist would play a prelude to the ceremony. The officiator, usually the bishop (similar to a "minister" in the Protestant service) of the ward (or "congregation" in the Protestant service), or the president of the stake (similar to a "diocese"; usually 10 to 12 wards in a stake) would conduct the service. The entrance of the wedding party would be similar to that in the Protestant ceremony. The service may include an opening prayer from the bishop, a musical number, a short speech from the bishop about marriage, then the vows, the exchange of rings (not mandatory, but it usually takes place), and the signing of the register. This entire process may last just 15 to 20 minutes.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Mexican
Mexican weddings are generally church ceremonies with the white gown for the bride and a tuxedo for the groom. Here are some common traditions observed at Mexican Catholic (see Roman Catholic) weddings. Love is united through religion with the use of a lazo, a huge rosary that is wrapped around the bride and groom as they are kneeling at the altar while the priest says a prayer for the couple. There are also gifts presented during the ceremony: coins (silver or gold), a Bible, and a rosary. These are handed to the couple by padrinos, usually two special people the couple has chosen. The coins symbolize prosperity.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Mennonite
"When most people think of Mennonite, they think of the more conservative ones, the more visible people, when really these represent only about 10 percent of Mennonites," says Joe Snyder, manager of the Mennonite Meeting Place in St. Jacobs, Ontario. The "conservative" Mennonites broke away in 1889. The Mennonite way of life varies from very conservative to very modern, with many degrees in between. The group represents 850,000 across the world in 60 different countries, speaking 100 different languages.
A modern Mennonite service would differ little from the more mainstream Protestant wedding ceremonies. The service would be held in a church where guests would be encouraged to participate in hymns. The ceremony may not last much longer than half an hour.
Guests attending a conservative ceremony would be mostly close family and friends. The ceremony would be held at home and may take a few hours, including a number of sermons.
A modern Mennonite service would differ little from the more mainstream Protestant wedding ceremonies. The service would be held in a church where guests would be encouraged to participate in hymns. The ceremony may not last much longer than half an hour.
Guests attending a conservative ceremony would be mostly close family and friends. The ceremony would be held at home and may take a few hours, including a number of sermons.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Jewish
Jewish weddings can vary greatly, with differences among the Orthodox, Conservative, and Reform branches. Each rabbi and synagogue could also have different interpretations of the ceremony. A Jewish wedding does not need to be performed in a synagogue or temple; the ceremony could take place almost anywhere, including a hotel, hall, or club.
A bride will often wear a face veil, especially if she is Orthodox. If the veiling ritual takes place, it occurs just before the ceremony, when the groom will veil the bride after he verifies that she is actually the woman he plans on marrying.
For Orthodox and Conservative ceremonies, all the men present will cover their heads with a yarmulke (a skull cap) or silk top hat. The head covering, a mark of respect in the presence of God, is a requirement for all men, including non-Jewish males, at the ceremony. Normally, Jewish men take along their own yarmulke. Extra yarmulkes, sometimes specially printed as a souvenir of the occasion, are provided for non-Jewish guests. The skull cap is meant to sit on top of the head. Sometimes, people secure it with bobby pins. However, if it happens to fall off, there's no harm done; simply put it back on.
Opposite to the Christian wedding, the seating arrangements at Orthodox and Conservative Jewish ceremonies have the bride's family and friends on the right side and the groom's family and friends on the left. Local custom will determine the order of the processsion and positions during the ceremony. The Orthodox and Conservative procession generally includes the groom and both sets of parents, sometimes even the grandparents.
The ceremony is performed under a huppah, a canopy often of embroidered cloth or flowers. Sometimes it's a prayer shawl spread across four poles. Special friends or relatives may have the honor of holding the poles. Depending on the couple's cultural background, personal preference, and local custom, the language of the service will vary, possibly with a combination of Hebrew and English. After vows are exchanged, the groom places a plain gold band on the bride's right index finger (in Orthodox and Conservative ceremonies) or on her left ring finger (for Reform ceremonies). Then the rabbi may read the ketubah, the traditional marriage contract. At some point during the service, the bride and groom will sip the ritual wine. Near the end of the ceremony, the traditional seven blessings will be recited or sung, after which the tradition of crushing the wine glass beneath the groom's heel takes place. The glass is often wrapped in a napkin or handkerchief before the groom stamps on it. The breaking of the glass represents the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem and acts as a reminder that in life and in marriage, there are times of sorrow and joy. Sometimes, after the closing benediction, guests will call out "Mazel tov!" (Congratulations or Good Luck).
For the Reform wedding, the procession, recession, and other parts of the ceremony are very similar to the Protestant service. There may be a double-ring ceremony. And there may or may not be a huppah.
A bride will often wear a face veil, especially if she is Orthodox. If the veiling ritual takes place, it occurs just before the ceremony, when the groom will veil the bride after he verifies that she is actually the woman he plans on marrying.
For Orthodox and Conservative ceremonies, all the men present will cover their heads with a yarmulke (a skull cap) or silk top hat. The head covering, a mark of respect in the presence of God, is a requirement for all men, including non-Jewish males, at the ceremony. Normally, Jewish men take along their own yarmulke. Extra yarmulkes, sometimes specially printed as a souvenir of the occasion, are provided for non-Jewish guests. The skull cap is meant to sit on top of the head. Sometimes, people secure it with bobby pins. However, if it happens to fall off, there's no harm done; simply put it back on.
Opposite to the Christian wedding, the seating arrangements at Orthodox and Conservative Jewish ceremonies have the bride's family and friends on the right side and the groom's family and friends on the left. Local custom will determine the order of the processsion and positions during the ceremony. The Orthodox and Conservative procession generally includes the groom and both sets of parents, sometimes even the grandparents.
The ceremony is performed under a huppah, a canopy often of embroidered cloth or flowers. Sometimes it's a prayer shawl spread across four poles. Special friends or relatives may have the honor of holding the poles. Depending on the couple's cultural background, personal preference, and local custom, the language of the service will vary, possibly with a combination of Hebrew and English. After vows are exchanged, the groom places a plain gold band on the bride's right index finger (in Orthodox and Conservative ceremonies) or on her left ring finger (for Reform ceremonies). Then the rabbi may read the ketubah, the traditional marriage contract. At some point during the service, the bride and groom will sip the ritual wine. Near the end of the ceremony, the traditional seven blessings will be recited or sung, after which the tradition of crushing the wine glass beneath the groom's heel takes place. The glass is often wrapped in a napkin or handkerchief before the groom stamps on it. The breaking of the glass represents the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem and acts as a reminder that in life and in marriage, there are times of sorrow and joy. Sometimes, after the closing benediction, guests will call out "Mazel tov!" (Congratulations or Good Luck).
For the Reform wedding, the procession, recession, and other parts of the ceremony are very similar to the Protestant service. There may be a double-ring ceremony. And there may or may not be a huppah.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Japanese
In North America, most Japanese are quite Westernized, so they tend to favor church weddings that follow the customary Western traditions. In Japan, however, while Western-style weddings are popular, there are more traditional Japanese elements involved, and the marriage rituals vary from place to place, family to family, and class to class.
In Japan, there are four basic types of wedding ceremonies: Shinto (the native Japanese religion), Buddhist, Christian, and non-religious. The wedding ceremonies are not, however, called Shinto weddings or Christian weddings; in Japan, they are referred to as Shinto-style weddings and Christian-style weddings. This is because the religion of a wedding ceremony is often just a "style" and may not reflect the beliefs of the people involved.
The most traditional wedding ceremony is the Shinto-style ceremony that includes only the immediate families, the nakoudo (the go-betweens who arranged for the couple to meet, like matchmakers), and the priest. The bride wears a white kimono with a fancy headpiece while the groom wears a black kimono with a striped hakama (almost skirt-like pants) and a black jacket. The ceremony includes some readings and the drinking of nine sips of sake, three each from each of three cups. There is a belief in Shinto that three is a lucky number; the nine sips (3 x 3) is a ritual for good luck.
Historically, there has been a strong tendency for the Shinto and Buddhist religions to mix. That is why you would see a lot of similar things when you visit a Shinto shrine or a Buddhist temple. At the Buddhist-style wedding ceremony, a monk officiates. The ceremony involves juzu prayer beads (like a rosary, but shorter) and some placing of incense.
At a Christian-style wedding, the dress is the same as in the West, with brides in white gowns and grooms in tuxedos. These ceremonies, most likely based on Protestant services, are often held in dedicated wedding facilities that look like churches but are not real, active parishes. In such locations, the particular denomination of the officiator probably makes little difference. The church wedding, for most Japanese, is chosen just because they like the image of it.
The official reception, the hiroen, is held in a hotel or other banquet facility. This event may be attended by: friends of the couple and of the family; the couple's colleagues and bosses; former teachers; and generally anybody with some social standing relative to the couple. There may be a hundred or so guests. Walking into the lobby outside the banquet hall, guests will find a reception table where they check in. Here, guests hand in an envelope containing a gift of money; people don't give gifts of merchandise at the wedding. The money should be in a particular kind of envelope decorated with gold cord tied in a particular kind of knot. Be careful. The writing and the type of knot on the envelope is different for weddings and funerals. The envelopes are purchased ready-made. The amount of cash depends on the guest's relationship to the couple. Friends may give 30,000 yen (approx. US$300), while older, richer relatives or bosses may give 50,000 yen. Apparently, odd numbers (e.g., 3 for 30,000 or 5 for 50,000) are considered luckier or somehow better, perhaps because an even number can be divided into two, something considered inappropriate for a marriage. Guests also receive a gift, usually pretty expensive, as they leave.
After the official reception, an informal party, the nijikai, is held at a restaurant. This is more for the friends of the couple and will include a wider circle of people. Generally, the bride and groom wear an evening dress and suit for this low-key affair.
In Japan, there are four basic types of wedding ceremonies: Shinto (the native Japanese religion), Buddhist, Christian, and non-religious. The wedding ceremonies are not, however, called Shinto weddings or Christian weddings; in Japan, they are referred to as Shinto-style weddings and Christian-style weddings. This is because the religion of a wedding ceremony is often just a "style" and may not reflect the beliefs of the people involved.
The most traditional wedding ceremony is the Shinto-style ceremony that includes only the immediate families, the nakoudo (the go-betweens who arranged for the couple to meet, like matchmakers), and the priest. The bride wears a white kimono with a fancy headpiece while the groom wears a black kimono with a striped hakama (almost skirt-like pants) and a black jacket. The ceremony includes some readings and the drinking of nine sips of sake, three each from each of three cups. There is a belief in Shinto that three is a lucky number; the nine sips (3 x 3) is a ritual for good luck.
Historically, there has been a strong tendency for the Shinto and Buddhist religions to mix. That is why you would see a lot of similar things when you visit a Shinto shrine or a Buddhist temple. At the Buddhist-style wedding ceremony, a monk officiates. The ceremony involves juzu prayer beads (like a rosary, but shorter) and some placing of incense.
At a Christian-style wedding, the dress is the same as in the West, with brides in white gowns and grooms in tuxedos. These ceremonies, most likely based on Protestant services, are often held in dedicated wedding facilities that look like churches but are not real, active parishes. In such locations, the particular denomination of the officiator probably makes little difference. The church wedding, for most Japanese, is chosen just because they like the image of it.
The official reception, the hiroen, is held in a hotel or other banquet facility. This event may be attended by: friends of the couple and of the family; the couple's colleagues and bosses; former teachers; and generally anybody with some social standing relative to the couple. There may be a hundred or so guests. Walking into the lobby outside the banquet hall, guests will find a reception table where they check in. Here, guests hand in an envelope containing a gift of money; people don't give gifts of merchandise at the wedding. The money should be in a particular kind of envelope decorated with gold cord tied in a particular kind of knot. Be careful. The writing and the type of knot on the envelope is different for weddings and funerals. The envelopes are purchased ready-made. The amount of cash depends on the guest's relationship to the couple. Friends may give 30,000 yen (approx. US$300), while older, richer relatives or bosses may give 50,000 yen. Apparently, odd numbers (e.g., 3 for 30,000 or 5 for 50,000) are considered luckier or somehow better, perhaps because an even number can be divided into two, something considered inappropriate for a marriage. Guests also receive a gift, usually pretty expensive, as they leave.
After the official reception, an informal party, the nijikai, is held at a restaurant. This is more for the friends of the couple and will include a wider circle of people. Generally, the bride and groom wear an evening dress and suit for this low-key affair.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Hindu
Hindu wedding ceremonies vary greatly, depending on geographical location, family customs, and personal taste. Even within India, there are differences in the clothes, ornaments, rituals, food, and the length of the wedding celebrations, which in some cases can last for several days. Sometimes, the festivities are shortened if the couple, for instance, has only a limited amount of time available in India because the groom might live and work in another country. Or, as in the case of a couple I know in Canada, the Hindu rituals were shortened because the bride was Roman Catholic and the couple wished to incorporate both religions, with two different ceremonies, into a one-day celebration. There are many variations in Hindu weddings as the bride and groom select the traditional elements that hold the most meaning for them. The multi-day celebration could be reduced to one day or even a few hours. There are many rituals that take place before and after the actual wedding ceremony.
Traditionally, an auspicious date and time for the marriage ceremony would be chosen based on astrological charts. A typical Hindu wedding is more of a community party than a solemn, quiet church gathering. Guests would walk around in the temple and socialize during the ceremony. They would talk and partake of the food and beverages. Guests often would sit on the floor; however, chairs are becoming more common now.
Some of the following rituals may be incorporated into a Hindu wedding:
At a wedding ceremony, there could be a sacrificial pit where a holy fire is lit. A priest will officiate.
At some point during the ceremony, the couple may circle (seven times in most parts of India) the holy fire, chanting and throwing in offerings such as rice.
The bride and groom may exchange garlands of fresh flowers, placing them around each other's neck.
The father of the bride offers her hand in marriage first of all to the deities (in Hinduism, there is one supreme being, with all the other gods being aspects of the one God) and then to the groom, with the groom assuring him that he will take care of her.
An important part of the ceremony is "tying the knot," where a gold necklace is tied around the bride's neck by the groom.
The saptapadi portion of the ceremony is the part where the bride and groom take seven steps together toward a long and happy marriage; with each step, the couple prays for different blessings, including wealth, happiness, strength, and devotion.
At some point during the ceremony, the bride may stand on a stone (representing firmness and stability) to signify loyalty and faithfulness in the marriage.
Traditionally, an auspicious date and time for the marriage ceremony would be chosen based on astrological charts. A typical Hindu wedding is more of a community party than a solemn, quiet church gathering. Guests would walk around in the temple and socialize during the ceremony. They would talk and partake of the food and beverages. Guests often would sit on the floor; however, chairs are becoming more common now.
Some of the following rituals may be incorporated into a Hindu wedding:
At a wedding ceremony, there could be a sacrificial pit where a holy fire is lit. A priest will officiate.
At some point during the ceremony, the couple may circle (seven times in most parts of India) the holy fire, chanting and throwing in offerings such as rice.
The bride and groom may exchange garlands of fresh flowers, placing them around each other's neck.
The father of the bride offers her hand in marriage first of all to the deities (in Hinduism, there is one supreme being, with all the other gods being aspects of the one God) and then to the groom, with the groom assuring him that he will take care of her.
An important part of the ceremony is "tying the knot," where a gold necklace is tied around the bride's neck by the groom.
The saptapadi portion of the ceremony is the part where the bride and groom take seven steps together toward a long and happy marriage; with each step, the couple prays for different blessings, including wealth, happiness, strength, and devotion.
At some point during the ceremony, the bride may stand on a stone (representing firmness and stability) to signify loyalty and faithfulness in the marriage.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Greek Orthodox
When my Chinese friend Jacqueline Wong got married to a Greek man in an Orthodox ceremony, many guests were surprised that the priest kept calling her "Elizabeth." It was not a mistake. "Since 'Jacqueline' is not recognized as a Christian name," explains my friend, she had to pick an appropriate name, so she chose "Elizabeth."
The essential text and faith of the Greek Orthodox Church and the Ukrainian Orthodox Church are the same, with slight variations in the wedding ceremony. In the Greek service, the best man assists with the crowning of the couple. Many rituals are repeated three times to honor the Holy Trinity.
The sacrament of matrimony begins with a betrothal ceremony that includes the blessing and placing of the rings on the fingers (on the right hand, not the left) of the bride and groom by the priest. This signifies the bond in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit rather than in the name of a human agent. During the marriage ceremony proper, the crowning of the couple takes place. The bride and groom are given a cup of wine called "the common cup of joys and sorrows," which is not Holy Communion; the couple must have received Communion prior to the wedding day. In another ritual, the bride and groom, with the assistance of the best man, walk around the ceremonial table three times.
The essential text and faith of the Greek Orthodox Church and the Ukrainian Orthodox Church are the same, with slight variations in the wedding ceremony. In the Greek service, the best man assists with the crowning of the couple. Many rituals are repeated three times to honor the Holy Trinity.
The sacrament of matrimony begins with a betrothal ceremony that includes the blessing and placing of the rings on the fingers (on the right hand, not the left) of the bride and groom by the priest. This signifies the bond in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit rather than in the name of a human agent. During the marriage ceremony proper, the crowning of the couple takes place. The bride and groom are given a cup of wine called "the common cup of joys and sorrows," which is not Holy Communion; the couple must have received Communion prior to the wedding day. In another ritual, the bride and groom, with the assistance of the best man, walk around the ceremonial table three times.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: German
"In Germany today, we have two basic religions, Protestant or Catholic (see Roman Catholic), so the services in the churches are basically the same as in North America," says Ingrid Scherer-Mohr, director for Canada of the German National Tourist Office. "We also have the lovely, old-fashioned, old city halls where emperors were crowned most of these buildings are about 400 years old, including the one in Frankfurt for civil weddings." According to Scherer-Mohr, there are about 10,000 castles and palaces in Germany, and many couples get married in old castles that have been transformed into hotels with wedding chapels. "Couples will have their service in a castle chapel and then the reception in the same castle. Germany has some 60 castle-hotels, many of them still run by some noble families."
As for the wedding ceremony, "It is still very popular to have the flowergirl and little boy throw real flower petals on the path down the aisle. On the way out, as they leave the church, these children precede the bride and groom. We never throw rice."
As for the wedding ceremony, "It is still very popular to have the flowergirl and little boy throw real flower petals on the path down the aisle. On the way out, as they leave the church, these children precede the bride and groom. We never throw rice."
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Chinese
These days, the majority of Chinese weddings in Hong Kong, North America, and Europe are Western in style, with the brides in white gowns. If the ceremony is a church wedding, it would likely be Protestant or Catholic (see Roman Catholic). Traditional Chinese elements that might be incorporated into the celebrations could include a multi-course (e.g., 12 courses) Chinese banquet, and the bride wearing a traditional silk outfit, whether a long skirt and jacket or the form-fitting chiansam with high slits up the sides of the skirt.
The traditional tea ceremony is often also observed after the church ceremony. As with most traditions and cultures, interpretations will vary depending on local custom, family history, and personal taste. Generally, the tea ceremony is regarded as the traditional Chinese marriage ceremony where the bride and groom show their respect to their elders, especially acknowledging the importance of and thanks toward their parents. Sometimes tea is served to just the groom's parents and sometimes to both sets of parents. In Hong Kong, for instance, this tradition could take place in the main sitting room of the home of the groom's parents, with the bride dressed in a scarlet red, embroidered silk outfit and often wearing a veil, too. Usually, just the more immediate family gather for this. The bride and groom would kneel together and thank heaven and earth. The bride kowtows to the groom's parents (and sometimes to her own parents, too). The groom greets the bride's parents (often without kowtowing). The bride then serves tea to the groom's father and mother. In return, the groom's parents give her a valuable gift, such as a piece of jewelry (sometimes a family heirloom or a new piece) as a symbol of acceptance into the family. The bride then bows to the groom's siblings, starting with the eldest brother and his spouse. (The hierarchy is eldest to youngest, with males preceding females.) The bride then pours tea for them, and they, in return, present her with gifts such as jewelry or lucky money in a red envelope.
For a traditional wedding in China, there were many rituals that preceded the wedding day. But on the actual date of the ceremony, the bride generally would get dressed in a red silk outfit with a red veil and be transported to the groom's home in a boxy, covered, wheel-less rickshaw-like carriage carried by one person in front and one in back. The bride's special female assistant (well familiar with wedding etiquette) would walk alongside the carriage. The procession would include gifts to take to the new home: jewelry, the bride's trousseau, a wooden trousseau chest, bedroom furniture (except for the bed, which is provided by the groom), lots of meats and dumplings. Upon arrival at the groom's home, the groom and his male relatives and friends would come out to greet the bride. The curtained opening at the front of the bridal carriage would be lifted and the female matchmaker (not the bride's special assistant) would carry the bride, piggyback, into the home. Once inside, the bride and groom would worship the groom's ancestors, after which the tea ceremony would begin. The bride's special assistant would direct her as to the proper proceedings and tasks required of her. The bride would pour tea for the eldest first, which could be the groom's grandparents who would then give her a red envelope of lucky money. After pouring tea for the groom's parents, she would likely receive jewelry from them. When the tea ceremony was complete, the feasting would begin for the whole village or community. Throughout the tea ceremony, there would be no officiator or exchange of vows.
The traditional tea ceremony is often also observed after the church ceremony. As with most traditions and cultures, interpretations will vary depending on local custom, family history, and personal taste. Generally, the tea ceremony is regarded as the traditional Chinese marriage ceremony where the bride and groom show their respect to their elders, especially acknowledging the importance of and thanks toward their parents. Sometimes tea is served to just the groom's parents and sometimes to both sets of parents. In Hong Kong, for instance, this tradition could take place in the main sitting room of the home of the groom's parents, with the bride dressed in a scarlet red, embroidered silk outfit and often wearing a veil, too. Usually, just the more immediate family gather for this. The bride and groom would kneel together and thank heaven and earth. The bride kowtows to the groom's parents (and sometimes to her own parents, too). The groom greets the bride's parents (often without kowtowing). The bride then serves tea to the groom's father and mother. In return, the groom's parents give her a valuable gift, such as a piece of jewelry (sometimes a family heirloom or a new piece) as a symbol of acceptance into the family. The bride then bows to the groom's siblings, starting with the eldest brother and his spouse. (The hierarchy is eldest to youngest, with males preceding females.) The bride then pours tea for them, and they, in return, present her with gifts such as jewelry or lucky money in a red envelope.
For a traditional wedding in China, there were many rituals that preceded the wedding day. But on the actual date of the ceremony, the bride generally would get dressed in a red silk outfit with a red veil and be transported to the groom's home in a boxy, covered, wheel-less rickshaw-like carriage carried by one person in front and one in back. The bride's special female assistant (well familiar with wedding etiquette) would walk alongside the carriage. The procession would include gifts to take to the new home: jewelry, the bride's trousseau, a wooden trousseau chest, bedroom furniture (except for the bed, which is provided by the groom), lots of meats and dumplings. Upon arrival at the groom's home, the groom and his male relatives and friends would come out to greet the bride. The curtained opening at the front of the bridal carriage would be lifted and the female matchmaker (not the bride's special assistant) would carry the bride, piggyback, into the home. Once inside, the bride and groom would worship the groom's ancestors, after which the tea ceremony would begin. The bride's special assistant would direct her as to the proper proceedings and tasks required of her. The bride would pour tea for the eldest first, which could be the groom's grandparents who would then give her a red envelope of lucky money. After pouring tea for the groom's parents, she would likely receive jewelry from them. When the tea ceremony was complete, the feasting would begin for the whole village or community. Throughout the tea ceremony, there would be no officiator or exchange of vows.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Baha'i
Baha'is believe in a love match, not an arranged marriage. With this in mind, individuals must be free to choose their own mates. Prior to the wedding, a couple should get to know each other's character and learn to trust and care for each other. In North America, there is now a movement to have a maximum of a 96-day engagement period prior to marriage.
For a Baha'i wedding ceremony to proceed, the couple needs the consent of all living parents and, if adopted, the permission of birth parents if at all possible, as well as adoptive parents. Parental permission is deemed important in the sense that it is considered helpful in preserving unity within the extended family and therefore providing support and strength for the marriage. The marriage must also be approved by the spiritual assembly of the local Baha'i community.
A marriage certificate from the local municipal office or city hall must be obtained. The wedding ceremony itself is simple, lasting for about 20 to 40 minutes, depending on what Baha'i writings the couple would like to have read or any music that the couple wishes to have incorporated into the ceremony. Instead of attendants such as bridesmaids and ushers, the couple will choose two witnesses to stand with them. During the ceremony, the couple will each say the words, "We will all, verily, abide by the will of God," and Baha'i marriage prayers are available and selections are often read by the witnesses or family members at that time. Afterwards, there is usually a festive celebration to which the community as a whole is invited.
The Baha'is do not have ministers as such, but each community can select one or two persons from the local spiritual assembly to act as marriage officers handling the administration of weddings. Baha'i law states that couples can exchange something of "value" as a token of their love for each other; in North America, this is often interpreted to mean the exchange of rings. There is no particular dress code, although most people wear their best clothes at the wedding and the woman being married may choose to wear a bridal gown.
For a Baha'i wedding ceremony to proceed, the couple needs the consent of all living parents and, if adopted, the permission of birth parents if at all possible, as well as adoptive parents. Parental permission is deemed important in the sense that it is considered helpful in preserving unity within the extended family and therefore providing support and strength for the marriage. The marriage must also be approved by the spiritual assembly of the local Baha'i community.
A marriage certificate from the local municipal office or city hall must be obtained. The wedding ceremony itself is simple, lasting for about 20 to 40 minutes, depending on what Baha'i writings the couple would like to have read or any music that the couple wishes to have incorporated into the ceremony. Instead of attendants such as bridesmaids and ushers, the couple will choose two witnesses to stand with them. During the ceremony, the couple will each say the words, "We will all, verily, abide by the will of God," and Baha'i marriage prayers are available and selections are often read by the witnesses or family members at that time. Afterwards, there is usually a festive celebration to which the community as a whole is invited.
The Baha'is do not have ministers as such, but each community can select one or two persons from the local spiritual assembly to act as marriage officers handling the administration of weddings. Baha'i law states that couples can exchange something of "value" as a token of their love for each other; in North America, this is often interpreted to mean the exchange of rings. There is no particular dress code, although most people wear their best clothes at the wedding and the woman being married may choose to wear a bridal gown.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: African-American
Most African-American weddings have Western-style church ceremonies these days, although there seems to be renewed interest in incorporating more traditional elements from the various cultures involved. Angela Lawrence, a Toronto-based magazine editor with a Jamaican background, had a Protestant ceremony. She says that a prominent feature would be the music, usually a gospel singer or gospel choir. Lawrence explains that the concept of an "Afro-centric flavor to a wedding" is mainly a North American idea that attempts to gain some connection with the cultural heritage by borrowing ideas from Africa or the Caribbean. This could be done through music drumming or through wardrobe. For instance, the wedding party might wear African garb such as tunic type gowns and headwraps. While the colorful fabrics and patterns may not necessarily come from the same region of Africa as the bride's and groom's own ancestry, what is important is the symbolism of remembering the Black roots in general.
One tradition that is making a comeback among today's African-Americans is known as "jumping the broom." Back in the days of slavery, African slaves were not allowed by law to marry because they were viewed merely as property, not people, and therefore had no rights. There was also the fear that if the slaves were allowed to marry and live together, their strength in numbers would grow and could lead to revolt. With some ingenuity, the slaves came up with "jumping the broom" to signify the couple's union. With their master's permission, a couple could gather with witnesses, declare their devotion to one another, and then jump over a broom to indicate their step into married life. Among many African peoples, the broom held significance because it represented the beginning of homemaking. While "jumping the broom" is fairly well-known in the United States, the practice is not as common in Canada not surprising, given the histories of the two countries.
At the turn of the century, another way for Black couples to show their commitment to one another was to cross sticks. The long, sturdy sticks, symbolizing the strength of trees, were crossed to signify the new union. Many traditions have links to African or Caribbean rituals. Sticks were used, too, for marriage ceremonies among the Samburu of Kenya; the groom would use them to brand the cattle that he gave to his bride. Cattle was also used as dowry for traditional Nigerian weddings.
One tradition that is making a comeback among today's African-Americans is known as "jumping the broom." Back in the days of slavery, African slaves were not allowed by law to marry because they were viewed merely as property, not people, and therefore had no rights. There was also the fear that if the slaves were allowed to marry and live together, their strength in numbers would grow and could lead to revolt. With some ingenuity, the slaves came up with "jumping the broom" to signify the couple's union. With their master's permission, a couple could gather with witnesses, declare their devotion to one another, and then jump over a broom to indicate their step into married life. Among many African peoples, the broom held significance because it represented the beginning of homemaking. While "jumping the broom" is fairly well-known in the United States, the practice is not as common in Canada not surprising, given the histories of the two countries.
At the turn of the century, another way for Black couples to show their commitment to one another was to cross sticks. The long, sturdy sticks, symbolizing the strength of trees, were crossed to signify the new union. Many traditions have links to African or Caribbean rituals. Sticks were used, too, for marriage ceremonies among the Samburu of Kenya; the groom would use them to brand the cattle that he gave to his bride. Cattle was also used as dowry for traditional Nigerian weddings.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Protestant
Certain Christian churches Anglican, Baptist, Presbyterian, United, and many others are denominations of the Protestant Church. "The Protestant Church has really only been in existence since the early 1500s," says Rev. Glenn Baker of Emmanuel United Church in Hamilton, Ontario. "That's when the Protestant Reformation occurred, so we've got that relatively short history there. The Protestant Church came out of the Roman Catholic Church, so all the traditions of the Catholic Church before that are part of our traditions, too."
At a Protestant wedding, before the ceremony begins, guests are likely to be greeted by ushers who will escort them to their seats in the church. The seating on the left side of the church facing the altar is reserved for the bride's family and friends, while the right side is reserved for the groom's. If one side is expected to outnumber the other by a great deal, the seating may be mixed. The front rows are reserved for immediate family members and special guests. Just before the ceremony is to begin, the bride's mother is the last person to be escorted to her seat. The minister gets into position at the head of the aisle, and the groom, best man, and ushers stand to the right of the altar. When the processional music begins, all the guests stand, and then the bridesmaids, maid/matron of honor, flowergirl, and ringbearer walk up the aisle, followed by the bride on her father's arm. The procession may vary from one church to another.
Throughout the service, the pastor generally will inform the guests about when they should stand or sit. There will be prayers and readings. If hymns are to be sung, guests may sing along with the music from the hymn books in the backs of the pews. Although singing is optional, people who feel uncomfortable singing should still stand if standing is required during the hymn. If the instructions of the officiator and the cues of other guests are followed, there shouldn't be a problem.
While it is not that common to see Communion served to all guests at a Protestant wedding, the practice is becoming more popular. "Of course, the Catholic Church has always celebrated Communion during wedding ceremonies," says Rev. Baker. "I don't know when the Protestant Church started getting away from serving Communion at weddings, but 12 or 15 years ago, it started coming back. It's still pretty rare in the United Church. I suppose, with a liturgical renewal across the Church, there has been an examination of how we worship and how we can make it more meaningful. I think that is how this started to come back in."
Communion, the commemoration of Christ's Last Supper, is the ceremony where bread and wine are consecrated and taken as the body and blood of Christ. Sometimes, only the bride and groom are served Communion. If Communion is offered to all guests, "passing the peace" (a.k.a. "the kiss of peace" or "the handshake of peace") may take place just beforehand, in which case everyone is encouraged to turn to their neighbors, shake their hands, and offer a friendly greeting. As for participation in Communion (eating the bread and drinking the wine), the officiator will indicate who is allowed to partake of the elements bread (pieces of bread or wafer) and wine (usually grape juice). Communion may be served to guests in their pews, or people may have to walk up the aisle to get the elements. Just observe and follow the example of other guests who are familiar with the proceedings. Guests can certainly choose to decline from participating in this.
At a Protestant wedding, before the ceremony begins, guests are likely to be greeted by ushers who will escort them to their seats in the church. The seating on the left side of the church facing the altar is reserved for the bride's family and friends, while the right side is reserved for the groom's. If one side is expected to outnumber the other by a great deal, the seating may be mixed. The front rows are reserved for immediate family members and special guests. Just before the ceremony is to begin, the bride's mother is the last person to be escorted to her seat. The minister gets into position at the head of the aisle, and the groom, best man, and ushers stand to the right of the altar. When the processional music begins, all the guests stand, and then the bridesmaids, maid/matron of honor, flowergirl, and ringbearer walk up the aisle, followed by the bride on her father's arm. The procession may vary from one church to another.
Throughout the service, the pastor generally will inform the guests about when they should stand or sit. There will be prayers and readings. If hymns are to be sung, guests may sing along with the music from the hymn books in the backs of the pews. Although singing is optional, people who feel uncomfortable singing should still stand if standing is required during the hymn. If the instructions of the officiator and the cues of other guests are followed, there shouldn't be a problem.
While it is not that common to see Communion served to all guests at a Protestant wedding, the practice is becoming more popular. "Of course, the Catholic Church has always celebrated Communion during wedding ceremonies," says Rev. Baker. "I don't know when the Protestant Church started getting away from serving Communion at weddings, but 12 or 15 years ago, it started coming back. It's still pretty rare in the United Church. I suppose, with a liturgical renewal across the Church, there has been an examination of how we worship and how we can make it more meaningful. I think that is how this started to come back in."
Communion, the commemoration of Christ's Last Supper, is the ceremony where bread and wine are consecrated and taken as the body and blood of Christ. Sometimes, only the bride and groom are served Communion. If Communion is offered to all guests, "passing the peace" (a.k.a. "the kiss of peace" or "the handshake of peace") may take place just beforehand, in which case everyone is encouraged to turn to their neighbors, shake their hands, and offer a friendly greeting. As for participation in Communion (eating the bread and drinking the wine), the officiator will indicate who is allowed to partake of the elements bread (pieces of bread or wafer) and wine (usually grape juice). Communion may be served to guests in their pews, or people may have to walk up the aisle to get the elements. Just observe and follow the example of other guests who are familiar with the proceedings. Guests can certainly choose to decline from participating in this.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Quaker (Religious Society of Friends)
Quakers, also called "Friends," do not participate in what would be considered typical Protestant services. In fact, Quakers do not use the words "ceremony" or "memorial." Instead, a service is called a "meeting." At the meeting house, Quakers worship in silent contemplation with punctuations of ministry from the participants as the spirit moves them to speak out loud. There is little formal structure to the meetings, and their length can vary, depending on the amount of ministry, from less than an hour to many hours.
When a couple decides to marry, the meeting is called "a meeting for worship for the celebration of marriage," the emphasis being placed on the idea of worship. Many Quaker meeting houses will provide non-Quakers with pamphlets describing the mode of service and history of the group. The meeting resembles a regular Quaker meeting until the point at which the man and woman wishing to marry feel that the moment is appropriate and they stand and declare their intention to marry. They make their vows to each other and are married by God. They then sign an often elaborately decorated copy of their declaration, which is then read aloud to family, friends, and members of the meeting house. A period of silence follows, during which participants pray for God's blessing for the couple. Anyone may rise during this time and speak in ministry. The meeting closes with the shaking of hands. "Afterwards, everyone signs the certificate," says Elmay Kirkpatrick of the Toronto Monthly Meeting. "There is a space left blank for people to sign because they all in fact were witnesses to the marriage." The couple must, however, follow up by signing a civil marriage certificate.
Most couples do not dress up for the service, nor are wedding rings a formal part of the ceremony. However, some couples today do introduce these elements.
For a look at the past, the Friends Meeting House, built in 1699, at Farewell and Marlborough streets in Newport, Rhode Island, is possibly the oldest Friends meeting house in America. (One or two others might compete for that distinction, but their dates are less clear.) According to Ron Potvin, curator of manuscripts at the Newport Historical Society, when a Quaker couple decided to marry, the man and woman "joined hands before the congregation and stated their intention to be married. It was more of a civil ceremony than a religious one. That's because Quakers did not believe in sacraments as other faiths do. It was contrary to the beliefs of Catholicism, where everything had to be sanctified by God through an elaborate ceremony. One of the basic beliefs of Protestantism was that people had an individual relationship with God that didn't require priests and sacraments. Newport, in its religious toleration (there were about 20 different Christian denominations here as well as Jews), was an extension of the Protestant Reformation in Europe."
The Quakers' custom of plainness also can be observed at the Friends' Meeting House located in Old Sturbridge Village in Sturbridge, Massachusetts. The building, which dates back to 1796, is typical in its deliberate lack of ornamentation. There are plain wooden pews, wood floors and windows, but the room is devoid of ornaments, drapery, or even symbols on the walls.
It's important to note that the Quakers should not be confused with the Shakers, who believed in celibacy. In the late-1700s, a small group of dissident English Quakers, noted for their trembling and shaking movements when they were moved by the spirit, became known as the Shaking Quakers, hence the name the Shakers.
When a couple decides to marry, the meeting is called "a meeting for worship for the celebration of marriage," the emphasis being placed on the idea of worship. Many Quaker meeting houses will provide non-Quakers with pamphlets describing the mode of service and history of the group. The meeting resembles a regular Quaker meeting until the point at which the man and woman wishing to marry feel that the moment is appropriate and they stand and declare their intention to marry. They make their vows to each other and are married by God. They then sign an often elaborately decorated copy of their declaration, which is then read aloud to family, friends, and members of the meeting house. A period of silence follows, during which participants pray for God's blessing for the couple. Anyone may rise during this time and speak in ministry. The meeting closes with the shaking of hands. "Afterwards, everyone signs the certificate," says Elmay Kirkpatrick of the Toronto Monthly Meeting. "There is a space left blank for people to sign because they all in fact were witnesses to the marriage." The couple must, however, follow up by signing a civil marriage certificate.
Most couples do not dress up for the service, nor are wedding rings a formal part of the ceremony. However, some couples today do introduce these elements.
For a look at the past, the Friends Meeting House, built in 1699, at Farewell and Marlborough streets in Newport, Rhode Island, is possibly the oldest Friends meeting house in America. (One or two others might compete for that distinction, but their dates are less clear.) According to Ron Potvin, curator of manuscripts at the Newport Historical Society, when a Quaker couple decided to marry, the man and woman "joined hands before the congregation and stated their intention to be married. It was more of a civil ceremony than a religious one. That's because Quakers did not believe in sacraments as other faiths do. It was contrary to the beliefs of Catholicism, where everything had to be sanctified by God through an elaborate ceremony. One of the basic beliefs of Protestantism was that people had an individual relationship with God that didn't require priests and sacraments. Newport, in its religious toleration (there were about 20 different Christian denominations here as well as Jews), was an extension of the Protestant Reformation in Europe."
The Quakers' custom of plainness also can be observed at the Friends' Meeting House located in Old Sturbridge Village in Sturbridge, Massachusetts. The building, which dates back to 1796, is typical in its deliberate lack of ornamentation. There are plain wooden pews, wood floors and windows, but the room is devoid of ornaments, drapery, or even symbols on the walls.
It's important to note that the Quakers should not be confused with the Shakers, who believed in celibacy. In the late-1700s, a small group of dissident English Quakers, noted for their trembling and shaking movements when they were moved by the spirit, became known as the Shaking Quakers, hence the name the Shakers.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Roman Catholic
There are basically two types of service: a wedding ceremony without a Mass; or a wedding ceremony incorporated into the Mass. The first option, about 20 minutes in length, is quite straightforward, with readings and hymns, similar to the Protestant service. The second option may take just over an hour.
As Catholics enter the church, they bless themselves by dipping the fingertips of their right hand into a font containing holy water, then they make the sign of the cross, touching their forehead, heart, left shoulder, and right shoulder. Other guests, who are not required to do this, may simply proceed into the church or be guided to their seats by the ushers. Some Catholics, on arrival at the pew, may make the sign of the cross while genuflecting (bending the knee as a sign of reverence). Some may go directly to their seats and sit down while others may kneel and pray before sitting; either is acceptable. While non-Catholics are welcome to genuflect, they are not required to observe all these signs of respect and awareness of the body of Christ present in the church.
Throughout the Mass, take your cues from those around you. The priest will also give instructions. There will be readings and prayers. At times, you will be required to stand. Sometimes, there may be kneeling, but non-Catholic guests can just sit quietly while others kneel. When the congregation is invited to participate in the recitation out loud of the Lord's Prayer, Protestants should be aware that Roman Catholics omit the final few lines: "For Thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory, forever and ever." During the wedding ceremony, vows and rings are exchanged. Just before Communion is served, there will be the "sign of peace": the priest might say, "Let us offer each other a sign of peace," and that is an indication for everyone to turn to their neighbors, shake their hands, and say, "Peace be with you" or some other friendly greeting. Sometimes, relatives or very close friends will hug and a mother may kiss her child at this point.
Communion in the Roman Catholic Church is technically reserved for baptized Catholics only. The priest will indicate what the local custom is. Communion, the commemoration of Christ's Last Supper, is the ceremony in which bread and wine are consecrated and taken as the body and blood of Christ. To take Communion, people walk down the center aisle to take the bread (often a wafer) and come back up the sides to their seats.
After Communion, the signing of the register takes place. When that is done, the priest introduces the newly married couple. At this point, sometimes people will applaud, depending on local custom.
As Catholics enter the church, they bless themselves by dipping the fingertips of their right hand into a font containing holy water, then they make the sign of the cross, touching their forehead, heart, left shoulder, and right shoulder. Other guests, who are not required to do this, may simply proceed into the church or be guided to their seats by the ushers. Some Catholics, on arrival at the pew, may make the sign of the cross while genuflecting (bending the knee as a sign of reverence). Some may go directly to their seats and sit down while others may kneel and pray before sitting; either is acceptable. While non-Catholics are welcome to genuflect, they are not required to observe all these signs of respect and awareness of the body of Christ present in the church.
Throughout the Mass, take your cues from those around you. The priest will also give instructions. There will be readings and prayers. At times, you will be required to stand. Sometimes, there may be kneeling, but non-Catholic guests can just sit quietly while others kneel. When the congregation is invited to participate in the recitation out loud of the Lord's Prayer, Protestants should be aware that Roman Catholics omit the final few lines: "For Thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory, forever and ever." During the wedding ceremony, vows and rings are exchanged. Just before Communion is served, there will be the "sign of peace": the priest might say, "Let us offer each other a sign of peace," and that is an indication for everyone to turn to their neighbors, shake their hands, and say, "Peace be with you" or some other friendly greeting. Sometimes, relatives or very close friends will hug and a mother may kiss her child at this point.
Communion in the Roman Catholic Church is technically reserved for baptized Catholics only. The priest will indicate what the local custom is. Communion, the commemoration of Christ's Last Supper, is the ceremony in which bread and wine are consecrated and taken as the body and blood of Christ. To take Communion, people walk down the center aisle to take the bread (often a wafer) and come back up the sides to their seats.
After Communion, the signing of the register takes place. When that is done, the priest introduces the newly married couple. At this point, sometimes people will applaud, depending on local custom.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Same Gender (Gay)
While same-sex marriages are not legally recognized in the United States or Canada, many churches will perform same-gender commitment ceremonies. However, the willingness to provide such services can vary within the denomination, so couples need to check with the individual congregation. Some of the denominations that have held ceremonies for same-gender couples include: American Baptist, Buddhist, Dignity USA, Quaker (Society of Friends), Reconstructionist Jewish, Reformed Catholic Church (USA), Unitarian, United Church of Canada, United Church of Christ and Metropolitan Community Church.
The Metropolitan Community Church, in particular, was founded in 1968 to administer to the spiritual needs of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community. There are approximately 300 Metropolitan Community churches in 18 countries.
The unions are usually called commitment ceremonies rather than weddings because these ceremonies currently do not grant any of the legal privileges of marriage, but they do serve as a way for gay couples to publicly acknowledge their love. In some States in the US and provinces in Canada, the couple can register as "domestic partners," which is helpful if you are employed by an organization that offers domestic-partner benefits.
When referring to the event, the term "same-gender marriage" is most appropriate (based on the wording in the rights decision by the Hawaii Supreme Court); avoid using the terms "gay marriage" and "homosexual marriage."
Invitations can be phrased in many ways. Some examples would be: "The A and B Families welcome you in celebrating the love between..." or "A and B request the pleasure of your presence to celebrate their commitment..."
The most visible difference between a same-gender wedding and a heterosexual wedding is the absence of traditional roles. There are neither "brides" nor "grooms," but "partners," "spouses" or "newlyweds," so the couple is referred to as such and the terms "bridal shower" and "stag party" are inappropriate. Instead, a party for one of the prospective partners is called a "premarital celebration." Guests still bring wedding gifts for the newlyweds, and often close friends or family will know if the couple has jointly registered for gifts at a department-store registry.
To begin the ceremony, the couple may walk up the aisle together, may approach the altar from opposite sides or can even be escorted up the aisle by their respective parents or friends. Personal preference will dictate the dress code--a lesbian couple may choose, for instance, for both women to wear bridal gowns. At the end of a partnership ceremony, the officiator may proclaim the couple "life partners, with the blessing of God's love."
The Metropolitan Community Church, in particular, was founded in 1968 to administer to the spiritual needs of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community. There are approximately 300 Metropolitan Community churches in 18 countries.
The unions are usually called commitment ceremonies rather than weddings because these ceremonies currently do not grant any of the legal privileges of marriage, but they do serve as a way for gay couples to publicly acknowledge their love. In some States in the US and provinces in Canada, the couple can register as "domestic partners," which is helpful if you are employed by an organization that offers domestic-partner benefits.
When referring to the event, the term "same-gender marriage" is most appropriate (based on the wording in the rights decision by the Hawaii Supreme Court); avoid using the terms "gay marriage" and "homosexual marriage."
Invitations can be phrased in many ways. Some examples would be: "The A and B Families welcome you in celebrating the love between..." or "A and B request the pleasure of your presence to celebrate their commitment..."
The most visible difference between a same-gender wedding and a heterosexual wedding is the absence of traditional roles. There are neither "brides" nor "grooms," but "partners," "spouses" or "newlyweds," so the couple is referred to as such and the terms "bridal shower" and "stag party" are inappropriate. Instead, a party for one of the prospective partners is called a "premarital celebration." Guests still bring wedding gifts for the newlyweds, and often close friends or family will know if the couple has jointly registered for gifts at a department-store registry.
To begin the ceremony, the couple may walk up the aisle together, may approach the altar from opposite sides or can even be escorted up the aisle by their respective parents or friends. Personal preference will dictate the dress code--a lesbian couple may choose, for instance, for both women to wear bridal gowns. At the end of a partnership ceremony, the officiator may proclaim the couple "life partners, with the blessing of God's love."
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Sikh
Sikhism, a religious sect founded in Northern India in the early 1500s as an offshoot of Hinduism, teaches the belief in only one deity
and rejects the caste system.
When attending a Sikh wedding, there are certain points of etiquette to keep in mind, according to Neetu Thakar, a Sikh acquaintance of mine who now lives in Toronto, Ontario, but was born and married in India. In terms of dress code for the guests, she says the preference is traditional costume. If that is not possible, then women should wear long skirts ("no short skirts or jeans"), preferably in dark, vibrant colors such as red or purple. Avoid wearing plain white cloth because white is considered unlucky; any flashes of white should be from embroidery or beading. Jewelry adornment is strongly encouraged. To enter the place of worship, both men and women should be wearing a head covering. Also, they must remove their shoes at the door because no leather, explains Thakar, must be brought inside, although purses are acceptable. When deciding on wardrobe, guests should keep in mind that during the ceremony, which can last about 1 1/2 hours, they will be sitting on the floor in the temple; there will be no cushions.
On the morning of the wedding, the bride will arrive at the temple after having been elaborately dressed and adorned with makeup and jewels by her female relatives. The day before, she would have had her hands and
legs painted with henna designs.
At the ceremony, the husband will be seated and then the bride's mother and the bride's best friend will escort her to her seat, with the bride and groom sitting facing both the pathi (the man who reads the holy book) and the holy book. After the couple is seated, the bride's mother will place one end of a special pink cloth in the bride's hand and the other on the groom's shoulder. The ritual involves the bride's mother taking the pink cloth, which is part of the groom's outfit, and tying it to part of the bride's headpiece literally, tying the knot and symbolizing the strength of joining two things together. There are readings about marriage and the duties of the couple. Promises are exchanged. The couple walks around the holy book four times, with the husband leading, and both of them holding on to the pink cloth to signify walking together. After each circle, the bride and groom kneel and bow toward the holy book. After the fourth time around, the wedding is completed. Then the couple sits down together.
At this point, the parents and grandparents stand up. The pathi addresses them regarding their roles in supporting the couple.
When the ceremony is over, all the guests go up to the front to congratulate the couple. Some guests may place a hand on the head of the bride and groom, like a blessing. Another tradition at this point, although technically optional for the guests, is to place a token amount of money (e.g., $2, $5, $10, whatever the guest can afford) into the pink cloth held by the bride and groom.
and rejects the caste system.
When attending a Sikh wedding, there are certain points of etiquette to keep in mind, according to Neetu Thakar, a Sikh acquaintance of mine who now lives in Toronto, Ontario, but was born and married in India. In terms of dress code for the guests, she says the preference is traditional costume. If that is not possible, then women should wear long skirts ("no short skirts or jeans"), preferably in dark, vibrant colors such as red or purple. Avoid wearing plain white cloth because white is considered unlucky; any flashes of white should be from embroidery or beading. Jewelry adornment is strongly encouraged. To enter the place of worship, both men and women should be wearing a head covering. Also, they must remove their shoes at the door because no leather, explains Thakar, must be brought inside, although purses are acceptable. When deciding on wardrobe, guests should keep in mind that during the ceremony, which can last about 1 1/2 hours, they will be sitting on the floor in the temple; there will be no cushions.
On the morning of the wedding, the bride will arrive at the temple after having been elaborately dressed and adorned with makeup and jewels by her female relatives. The day before, she would have had her hands and
legs painted with henna designs.
At the ceremony, the husband will be seated and then the bride's mother and the bride's best friend will escort her to her seat, with the bride and groom sitting facing both the pathi (the man who reads the holy book) and the holy book. After the couple is seated, the bride's mother will place one end of a special pink cloth in the bride's hand and the other on the groom's shoulder. The ritual involves the bride's mother taking the pink cloth, which is part of the groom's outfit, and tying it to part of the bride's headpiece literally, tying the knot and symbolizing the strength of joining two things together. There are readings about marriage and the duties of the couple. Promises are exchanged. The couple walks around the holy book four times, with the husband leading, and both of them holding on to the pink cloth to signify walking together. After each circle, the bride and groom kneel and bow toward the holy book. After the fourth time around, the wedding is completed. Then the couple sits down together.
At this point, the parents and grandparents stand up. The pathi addresses them regarding their roles in supporting the couple.
When the ceremony is over, all the guests go up to the front to congratulate the couple. Some guests may place a hand on the head of the bride and groom, like a blessing. Another tradition at this point, although technically optional for the guests, is to place a token amount of money (e.g., $2, $5, $10, whatever the guest can afford) into the pink cloth held by the bride and groom.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Wiccan
Wiccan High Priestess Leanne Haze of Toronto, Ontario, says, "Wicca is an association of autonymous covens, so even though the ceremony will be 8,000 years old, each coven will have its own flavor in the presentation." Wiccans refer to weddings as handfastings, because in a part of the ceremony the bride's and groom's hands are tied together as a symbol that their love will bind them together and to the gods. The handfasting is performed usually by a high priestess and sometimes by a high priest.
Haze provides these guidelines for guests who attend handfastings. "Do not bring your ego in. Dress comfortably, because there's a lot of standing and dancing in a circle. We usually do it outdoors in a field, in someone's backyard, or in the woods, so stiletto heels are out." She also warns guests "not to be too shocked if the bride and groom show up naked. But a lot of times, when outsiders or non-initiates are invited, the couple wears clothes not always, but sometimes." Although the bride and groom are naked, Haze reassures guests that the couple does not engage in sexual activity during the ceremony. The naked groom represents consciousness and all masculine powers while the naked bride represents subconsciousness and all feminine powers. The nakedness symbolizes both sides not hiding anything from each other. When consciousness and subconsciousness are working together, harmony results. "That creates a wholesome human being."
Guests should also be aware of circle etiquette when doing the circle dance, which involves everyone holding hands. "You don't let go of someone's hand (e.g., to scratch your nose) because you don't want to break the circuit," explains Haze. "It's more powerful if the circle is kept intact. If you do need to break the circle because you're dizzy, for example you step into the circle (still holding hands), get the two people whose hands you're holding to connect behind you, and then you can sit down inside the circle." Haze has been involved in circle dances ranging from 12 to 200 people.
She explains that publishing the words of any Wiccan ceremony breaks Wiccan laws. "All Wiccan liturgies are written on two levels, so they can't be taken literally on just the surface. Without the inner meaning, which you can only get through initiation, you don't understand the full impact and know the inner process. The words are an analogy to what's really going on inside a person. That's only revealed within the initiates' circle."
According to Lois Devine, a high priestess from Salem, Massachusetts, who has been practicing the religion for 28 years, a good rule of thumb when attending a Wiccan handfasting is to ask what to wear. "The couple may have different themes. Some may want you to dress in earth tones, others may want period costumes from the Renaissance, or they may prefer you wear black," says Devine. The handfasting begins when the circle is cast. Because it is a nature-based religion, the elements of earth, fire, water, and air are called upon by the high priest or priestess. Symbols used in the handfasting include a consecrated cup filled with water, juice, or wine, which represents the female, and a ritual dagger, or athame, which represents the male. "At some point, the dagger is usually dipped into the cup to represent fertility, not just of the couple, but for everything in their life. It's the same as throwing rice," explains Devine. Like many modern couples, the bride and groom may write their own vows or compile a ceremony from many different sources. The handfasting may last from 30 minutes to more than an hour and ends when the circle is broken as the high priest or priestess walks around the circle with the dagger pointed outward.
A handfasting, says Haze, is "a great celebration of love and life, so the more lighthearted you are, the more you'll get out of it and the bigger the blessing you'll receive. Wicca is a great mystery, but the key to that mystery is love love for all living beings. If the ceremony is performed properly, everyone should experience a balancing of their own inner and outer nature."
Haze provides these guidelines for guests who attend handfastings. "Do not bring your ego in. Dress comfortably, because there's a lot of standing and dancing in a circle. We usually do it outdoors in a field, in someone's backyard, or in the woods, so stiletto heels are out." She also warns guests "not to be too shocked if the bride and groom show up naked. But a lot of times, when outsiders or non-initiates are invited, the couple wears clothes not always, but sometimes." Although the bride and groom are naked, Haze reassures guests that the couple does not engage in sexual activity during the ceremony. The naked groom represents consciousness and all masculine powers while the naked bride represents subconsciousness and all feminine powers. The nakedness symbolizes both sides not hiding anything from each other. When consciousness and subconsciousness are working together, harmony results. "That creates a wholesome human being."
Guests should also be aware of circle etiquette when doing the circle dance, which involves everyone holding hands. "You don't let go of someone's hand (e.g., to scratch your nose) because you don't want to break the circuit," explains Haze. "It's more powerful if the circle is kept intact. If you do need to break the circle because you're dizzy, for example you step into the circle (still holding hands), get the two people whose hands you're holding to connect behind you, and then you can sit down inside the circle." Haze has been involved in circle dances ranging from 12 to 200 people.
She explains that publishing the words of any Wiccan ceremony breaks Wiccan laws. "All Wiccan liturgies are written on two levels, so they can't be taken literally on just the surface. Without the inner meaning, which you can only get through initiation, you don't understand the full impact and know the inner process. The words are an analogy to what's really going on inside a person. That's only revealed within the initiates' circle."
According to Lois Devine, a high priestess from Salem, Massachusetts, who has been practicing the religion for 28 years, a good rule of thumb when attending a Wiccan handfasting is to ask what to wear. "The couple may have different themes. Some may want you to dress in earth tones, others may want period costumes from the Renaissance, or they may prefer you wear black," says Devine. The handfasting begins when the circle is cast. Because it is a nature-based religion, the elements of earth, fire, water, and air are called upon by the high priest or priestess. Symbols used in the handfasting include a consecrated cup filled with water, juice, or wine, which represents the female, and a ritual dagger, or athame, which represents the male. "At some point, the dagger is usually dipped into the cup to represent fertility, not just of the couple, but for everything in their life. It's the same as throwing rice," explains Devine. Like many modern couples, the bride and groom may write their own vows or compile a ceremony from many different sources. The handfasting may last from 30 minutes to more than an hour and ends when the circle is broken as the high priest or priestess walks around the circle with the dagger pointed outward.
A handfasting, says Haze, is "a great celebration of love and life, so the more lighthearted you are, the more you'll get out of it and the bigger the blessing you'll receive. Wicca is a great mystery, but the key to that mystery is love love for all living beings. If the ceremony is performed properly, everyone should experience a balancing of their own inner and outer nature."
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Unitarian
Important events in every human being's life--whether that be the birth of a child, a marriage or a death--often call for special services that traditional religions can readily provide. However, some people do not have a church affiliation, while other individuals who have connections to more than one background try to juggle the dilemma of accommodating the needs of all the traditions. Instead of foregoing a ceremony altogether or blindly accepting all the customs and formal rituals, there is an alternative provided by the Unitarian Church.
Today's Unitarian Church is a combination of the 1961 merger of the Unitarian and Universalist churches. In the United States, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin and John Adams were all Unitarians. Members reject the trinity concept in favor of monotheism, where God is considered one entity, hence "Unitarian."
Unitarian Universalists believe in an individual ethical value system rather than ritualistic formalities and dogma. Personal choice in spiritual matters and ceremonies being key, Unitarian ministers are free to adapt the form and content of ceremonies to incorporate words and music important to the couple getting married. Unitarian ministers regularly conduct marriage ceremonies where one or both of the parties are divorced or from mixed-faith backgrounds; commitment ceremonies are also performed for couples who are lesbian or gay. (See Same Gender.) These ministers may conduct a re-dedication of a marriage, a blessing of a same-gender union and even a ceremony to mark a separation when two people have decided to part amicably.
The minister and the couple work together to design an individualized wedding ceremony that also incorporates any legal requirement to register the heterosexual marriage. Marriage and partnership ceremonies can incorporate unique features to meet the wishes of participants, with the inclusion, for instance, of a significant quotation, poem or personal pledge. The wedding can be tailored to reflect the philosophical views of the couple. Where the law allows, the wedding service or the religious blessing of a civil marriage ceremony can take place anywhere.
Today's Unitarian Church is a combination of the 1961 merger of the Unitarian and Universalist churches. In the United States, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin and John Adams were all Unitarians. Members reject the trinity concept in favor of monotheism, where God is considered one entity, hence "Unitarian."
Unitarian Universalists believe in an individual ethical value system rather than ritualistic formalities and dogma. Personal choice in spiritual matters and ceremonies being key, Unitarian ministers are free to adapt the form and content of ceremonies to incorporate words and music important to the couple getting married. Unitarian ministers regularly conduct marriage ceremonies where one or both of the parties are divorced or from mixed-faith backgrounds; commitment ceremonies are also performed for couples who are lesbian or gay. (See Same Gender.) These ministers may conduct a re-dedication of a marriage, a blessing of a same-gender union and even a ceremony to mark a separation when two people have decided to part amicably.
The minister and the couple work together to design an individualized wedding ceremony that also incorporates any legal requirement to register the heterosexual marriage. Marriage and partnership ceremonies can incorporate unique features to meet the wishes of participants, with the inclusion, for instance, of a significant quotation, poem or personal pledge. The wedding can be tailored to reflect the philosophical views of the couple. Where the law allows, the wedding service or the religious blessing of a civil marriage ceremony can take place anywhere.
Types of Wedding Ceremonies: Ukrainian Orthodox
Among Ukrainians, the Orthodox Church is fairly common. At the entrance, before walking down the aisle, members may cross themselves three times, each time touching the tips of their fingers to their forehead, heart, right shoulder, and left shoulder (slightly different from the Roman Catholic blessing, where the order is the forehead, heart, left shoulder, and right shoulder). Often, people will pick up a candle and take it to the candle stand at the front to be lit. After guests go into the pews, some may kneel on the bench, cross themselves again, and say a silent prayer before sitting down. Guests who are not members of the Orthodox Church do not need to follow any of these procedures, instead going directly to their pews and sitting down.
While there may be a choir to provide music, there are no musical instruments at all. "The main theological reason," explains Father Bohdan Hladio of St. Vladimir Ukrainian Orthodox Church in Hamilton, Ontario, "is that of all the musical instruments, only the voice was created by God." The concept is to maintain "God-centeredness as opposed to man-centeredness."
There is no Communion served at an Orthodox Church wedding ceremony. Communion would have been served the day or week before the wedding. No marriage vows are exchanged either.
The Ukrainian Orthodox Church is very similar to the Greek Orthodox Church. "The essential text and the faith are the same," says Father Bohdan. In the Ukrainian ceremony, the best man participates in the exchange of the rings. "The rings are the sign of betrothal. The crowns are the sign of the marriage." A major part of the ceremony is the wearing of the crowns by the bride and groom. "This is the central moment of the service," says Father Bohdan. "The crowns signify the formation of a new royalty – a new family unit. They also represent the crowns of the martyrs. The martyrs give their lives for God; likewise, the married couple is called upon to give their lives for each other." While the bride and groom are wearing the crowns, the circumambulation takes place: the couple walks around the table (where items for the service, such as the gospel book and the crowns, have been placed) three times. "This action signifies the centrality of God in the life of the new couple as their first steps are taken literally around the gospel, which is on the table. The circumambulation also signifies the passage of time. In the old days, crowns were left on for eight days."
While there may be a choir to provide music, there are no musical instruments at all. "The main theological reason," explains Father Bohdan Hladio of St. Vladimir Ukrainian Orthodox Church in Hamilton, Ontario, "is that of all the musical instruments, only the voice was created by God." The concept is to maintain "God-centeredness as opposed to man-centeredness."
There is no Communion served at an Orthodox Church wedding ceremony. Communion would have been served the day or week before the wedding. No marriage vows are exchanged either.
The Ukrainian Orthodox Church is very similar to the Greek Orthodox Church. "The essential text and the faith are the same," says Father Bohdan. In the Ukrainian ceremony, the best man participates in the exchange of the rings. "The rings are the sign of betrothal. The crowns are the sign of the marriage." A major part of the ceremony is the wearing of the crowns by the bride and groom. "This is the central moment of the service," says Father Bohdan. "The crowns signify the formation of a new royalty – a new family unit. They also represent the crowns of the martyrs. The martyrs give their lives for God; likewise, the married couple is called upon to give their lives for each other." While the bride and groom are wearing the crowns, the circumambulation takes place: the couple walks around the table (where items for the service, such as the gospel book and the crowns, have been placed) three times. "This action signifies the centrality of God in the life of the new couple as their first steps are taken literally around the gospel, which is on the table. The circumambulation also signifies the passage of time. In the old days, crowns were left on for eight days."
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
What Should You Look for in a Wedding Cake
The cake is an important part of the wedding. Like the gown, many brides have an image of what the cake should look like. Then again, many brides do not even think of the cake till the last minute. There are several things to consider when deciding on a cake.
Taste
Though it often takes a back seat to appearance, the taste of the cake is important. If it is pleasing and delicious, it will be more special to you. Something to consider also is how popular is the flavor. Carrot cake, though delicious (and one of my favorites) is too unusual for everyone to enjoy.
Freshness
If the cake is made well in advance, you will be sure that it will be ready for your ceremony. You can also be sure that not many people will enjoy it. Cakes will show their age if made too far in advance, so be careful!
Appearance
Perhaps the most important aspect, the cake should look like it belongs at your wedding. Take pictures of the reception hall prior to ordering the cake. The pictures will help you and the baker decide on an appearance that matches or plays off the surroundings. A white cake will be very striking in a colorful environment.
Be original. It is the bride's right to create choose a cake that reflects her personality and lifestyle. Most bakers will show you pictures of their work. Though this can give you ideas, you don't have to choose a cake that looks like any of those pictures.
Balance
Make sure the cake is "in balance" with the rest of the reception. Are you ordering a chocolate cake, even though you have other chocolate desserts? Are you ordering an exquisite ten-layer masterpiece for a cozy reception of close friends?
Presence
Remember this is the centerpiece of the reception. It should make an impression. It can be anything you like, German chocolate, quadruple-tiered with the figures of the whole bridal party sculpted in sugar on top. However, you like it, the cake should not be a forgotten part of the ceremony, glanced at once and never mentioned again. We just recommend that you do not use real flowers to decorate the cake as they may contain pesticides which, though memorable, would not make the impression that you would like.
Taste
Though it often takes a back seat to appearance, the taste of the cake is important. If it is pleasing and delicious, it will be more special to you. Something to consider also is how popular is the flavor. Carrot cake, though delicious (and one of my favorites) is too unusual for everyone to enjoy.
Freshness
If the cake is made well in advance, you will be sure that it will be ready for your ceremony. You can also be sure that not many people will enjoy it. Cakes will show their age if made too far in advance, so be careful!
Appearance
Perhaps the most important aspect, the cake should look like it belongs at your wedding. Take pictures of the reception hall prior to ordering the cake. The pictures will help you and the baker decide on an appearance that matches or plays off the surroundings. A white cake will be very striking in a colorful environment.
Be original. It is the bride's right to create choose a cake that reflects her personality and lifestyle. Most bakers will show you pictures of their work. Though this can give you ideas, you don't have to choose a cake that looks like any of those pictures.
Balance
Make sure the cake is "in balance" with the rest of the reception. Are you ordering a chocolate cake, even though you have other chocolate desserts? Are you ordering an exquisite ten-layer masterpiece for a cozy reception of close friends?
Presence
Remember this is the centerpiece of the reception. It should make an impression. It can be anything you like, German chocolate, quadruple-tiered with the figures of the whole bridal party sculpted in sugar on top. However, you like it, the cake should not be a forgotten part of the ceremony, glanced at once and never mentioned again. We just recommend that you do not use real flowers to decorate the cake as they may contain pesticides which, though memorable, would not make the impression that you would like.
Wedding Cake Basics and A Basic Wedding Cake (Part II)
In the first part we covered a brief history, and the planning and creation of a basic wedding cake. This time, it's on to more practical considerations -- business (contracts, pricing, etc.), transportation, and set-up concerns.
This article is designed to get a beginner started. Of course, things can get much more involved as you gain fame and fortune!
CONTRACTING
I always have a written contract with the bride. First, it assures her that you will make and have a wedding cake delivered for her. It also protects you. You now have a written contract that has every detail you would want to know about the cake.
I usually contract for cakes about 4-6 months ahead of time, however, if my calendar permits, I have contracted as little as two weeks before the wedding. Be careful of the latter, as the bride may not have completely thought out what she wants if it is this late.
There are many ways to prepare a contract, and you may wish to seek professional guidance, but my contract includes the following: A statement that the contract is between me and the bride (or whoever is paying), married name, address and phone of the customer. A description of what the cake is, what it will look like (with references to pictures), the number to be served, date, time and address for delivery, contact person's name at the reception, flavors, cake sizes, colors, number of tiers and layers, and any other information which might help accurately describe exactly what the agreement is for. Of course, you must also include the price, amounts of deposits, delivery charge, accessory costs (lace, pearls, plastics, etc.), and sales tax amount. The completed contract must be signed and dated by you and the customer, and I leave a place for the contact person to accept and sign for the delivered cake.
Be sure you discuss what goes in between pillars and write that into the contract. If the bride is to provide items, such as flowers, goblets or netting, note that as well. That way there is no question as to who is going to supply which items. It is also a good way to be sure that you don't forget months down the road.
I require 1/3 of the money down as a deposit. Some people require l/2 down. Mine is non-refundable unless there is a death in the immediate family. If the wedding is canceled, you do not want to be out all of the money, especially if you have turned down other weddings in its place. This is a way of compensating you for that. I suggest that you require at least as much down as the cost of your ingredients.
I also get a separate deposit on the separators and accessories that are to be returned to me. (Some people just include those items in the cost of their cakes, but I don't feel most brides need those items. I am there for her convenience and service.) I price the items at my cost plus 20%. The extra percentage covers my gas and wear and tear on my car. If the items are not returned within two weeks of the wedding, I keep the deposit.
If the final check has not arrived a week before the wedding, I think that it is a good idea to call the bride to let her know you are going to need cash on the day of the wedding. A simple phone call can relieve a lot of embarrassment and confusion on the day of delivery. The bride can leave the cash with the person who is to sign for the cake.
PRICING THE CAKE
Obviously, pricing varies depending on the area in which you live. Call around the area to find out what others are charging. Be sure to check your local bakeries, independent bakers and grocery stores, just so you know what you're up against.
In some areas, people are getting as little as $.75 per slice, in other areas pricing starts at about $1.85 per slice and goes up from there. Don't underprice yourself. You are spending a lot of time on this cake and you need to be paid for your time and talent. In my area I would say most people charge by the slice. Also, I figure that every time I have to go around the cake with a tip, the price goes up a few cents per slice.
If a bride wants a cake for 150 people, and your pans either make 143 or 161 slices, don't just charge her for 150 and make the 161 size. Offer her a choice, then let her pay for the cake she chooses.
Allow a minimum of two inches between cake sizes. I think that four inches looks the best, but two will suffice. Also, be careful to consider symmetry. You probably don't want a stacked cake with a bottom layer of 14", a middle layer of 8", and a top 6". Just consider how it will look stacked. I usually set up the look of the cakes with empty cake pans turned upside down for the brides. If you need more cake than what the bride needs to get the look you want, then tell her. You are the professional and know what will look good and what won't.
Sometimes, part or all of a given cake will be a "dummy" -- for appearances only. I have found that most people charge about the same price for a dummy as for cake. You are still using the same icing and the same time decorating. Also, you have the expense of the dummy itself.
I've asked all around the country, and it seems that carrot cake is a minimum of $.50 per slice more than regular cake. Some people have a basic (white) price, then go up as the flavor requires.
Flower prices depend on the type, royal or gumpaste. Some people charge per spray, others figure it into the cost of the cake per slice. You have to decide what you want to do. Get a system, write it down, then stick to it. Generally, fillings run from $.05 per slice to $1.50 per slice for liqueur flavors, or more, depending on the ingredients and time required.
Rolled buttercream or fondant cakes are much more expensive than regular butter cream cakes. In asking around the country at shows, the least expensive cake of this type I have found is $2.50 per slice. There are places in Maryland and New York where they are getting $8.50 plus per slice for fondant cakes
You ask, "How do I break into the more expensive cakes?" Make dummies of both, then offer the brides a choice. If your more expensive cake looks more elegant and that is her wish, more often than not, she will be willing to pay for it.
ON YOUR WAY TO THE RECEPTION
I use carpet foam under the cake tiers to transport the cake It helps absorb any bumps in the car or van. It will prevent a lot of repairs at the reception site. (But if it's too thick, you may chance the cake tipping on the way.) I also cover the foam with a clean white sheet. In case of an accident, heaven forbid, at least the cake would be clean for repairs. If you can't get foam, use the grid-like grip mats for carpets to prevent the cakes from shifting. Some people use boxes to transport wedding cakes. I don't because I feel they can enhance accidents rather than prevent them (for example, putting fingers or flaps into the cake when removing the cake).
A sign for the car, "WEDDING CAKE IN TRANSPORT" is nice. It can keep motorists from tailgating. The sign should be big enough that they don't have to get close to see it, but not obstructing your view. Also, place is so that it cannot drop onto the cake in transport.
When rounding corners, my advice is to creep. You may also want to turn on your flashers to warn other motorists that you are going slowly. Also, leave yourself enough time that you don't have to rush. Sudden starts and stops can find a wedding cake inches off of its plate by the time you get where you are going.
On warm days, ensure that your air conditioning is working and turn it up so that the car is cool. Avoid having the cake sitting in a hot car for any length of time. If the delivery is to be made to an unairconditioned hall, don't get there too early. Also, don't cover the cake with plastic wrap for any length of time as it will make the cake too moist and soggy.
Be sure to take your camera and flash to take pictures after you've set up the cake. Pictures are nice for portfolios later. I also like to get double prints so I can send the bride a picture of her cake. (Many times the photographer's cake pictures include the entire cake table, including skirt and all you can see is the outline of the cake. Mine are a lot more detailed.)
Take icing, bags, any tips you used on the cake, and a spatula for any repairs. Check your supplies and put them in a bag or box. Do you need an extension cord for the fountain? If so, pack it ahead of time.
I always make a one page list for the hotel or reception caterers of what I need returned. This helps them to make sure I get back what I am expecting and the bride does not get charged. (Netting/tulle is washable and reusable.) I may also leave a cake cutting guide if there is a family member cutting the cake. Provide the bride with a box for her top tier. This is usually left under the cake cutting table.
Do you have the topper? Don't forget it if the bride has provided you one ahead of time. Also, are there ribbons or extras you need to take for in between the tiers, on pillars, etc.? A shopping bag is a nice carrier for these items.
SET UP AT THE RECEPTION SITE
My first suggestion is INSIST ON IT!!! Once you accept money for a wedding cake you are a professional. If the cake does not make it to the reception in good condition, it reflects on you, even if you may have not transported it. My experience in the past has been that even if I did not transport it, I ended up repairing it at the site anyway, so go ahead and charge for delivery and set up. I use a flat fee for certain areas, others have a fee per mile. (Don't forget you have to get home, too, so charge for that as well. It's your time and gas).
Before you go into the site with the big cake, check out the table, its position, readiness for the cake, etc. Insist that the cake NOT BE MOVED once you set it up. My favorite thing to do under a cake is to "cloud" the table with an extra table cloth as shown in the photo. Most hotels will provide this to you at no extra charge. Bunch the cloth to look like a cloud, leaving it flat in the center where the cake will be. This is an inexpensive way to fancy the cake without a whole lot of fuss.
When transporting the cake from the car to the reception room, use common sense. If you use a cart for this purpose, it should be sturdy enough not to collapse when it hits a bump. Obviously, your cake will go with it. Also, when taking a cart over the bumps between rooms, lift- DO NOT ROLL- both the front and the back wheels. This will prevent the cake from flying off the cart.
Give yourself enough time to set up the cake, but not too much time that something could happen to the cake. (I remember seeing a wedding cake that was delivered in the morning for an afternoon wedding...still in a box. During the day, someone put their fingers into the cake.
It may be a good idea to contact the florist ahead of time. I prefer small flowers over large so as not to overpower a cake. If you ask for rosebuds, make sure that you get sweetheart rosebuds, otherwise you may be in for a big surprise. Usually the florist will leave the flowers in a box for you to place on the cake.
Once the cake is delivered and set up properly, get your designated contact person to sign the acceptance line at the bottom of the contract. At this point that person takes responsibility for the cake. If there is a question as to its proper delivery you have a name and signature which could prevent problems for you later.
I have found that wedding cakes are much more profitable than birthday or anniversary cakes. If you have never done a tiered cake before, it might be wise to take a class. Many programs offer classes in tiered/wedding cake construction, so you can practice before you have to do the real thing. I was more nervous for my first wedding cake than I was for my own wedding, but now they are not a big deal.
Know what you are doing and both you and the bride will be happy.
This article is designed to get a beginner started. Of course, things can get much more involved as you gain fame and fortune!
CONTRACTING
I always have a written contract with the bride. First, it assures her that you will make and have a wedding cake delivered for her. It also protects you. You now have a written contract that has every detail you would want to know about the cake.
I usually contract for cakes about 4-6 months ahead of time, however, if my calendar permits, I have contracted as little as two weeks before the wedding. Be careful of the latter, as the bride may not have completely thought out what she wants if it is this late.
There are many ways to prepare a contract, and you may wish to seek professional guidance, but my contract includes the following: A statement that the contract is between me and the bride (or whoever is paying), married name, address and phone of the customer. A description of what the cake is, what it will look like (with references to pictures), the number to be served, date, time and address for delivery, contact person's name at the reception, flavors, cake sizes, colors, number of tiers and layers, and any other information which might help accurately describe exactly what the agreement is for. Of course, you must also include the price, amounts of deposits, delivery charge, accessory costs (lace, pearls, plastics, etc.), and sales tax amount. The completed contract must be signed and dated by you and the customer, and I leave a place for the contact person to accept and sign for the delivered cake.
Be sure you discuss what goes in between pillars and write that into the contract. If the bride is to provide items, such as flowers, goblets or netting, note that as well. That way there is no question as to who is going to supply which items. It is also a good way to be sure that you don't forget months down the road.
I require 1/3 of the money down as a deposit. Some people require l/2 down. Mine is non-refundable unless there is a death in the immediate family. If the wedding is canceled, you do not want to be out all of the money, especially if you have turned down other weddings in its place. This is a way of compensating you for that. I suggest that you require at least as much down as the cost of your ingredients.
I also get a separate deposit on the separators and accessories that are to be returned to me. (Some people just include those items in the cost of their cakes, but I don't feel most brides need those items. I am there for her convenience and service.) I price the items at my cost plus 20%. The extra percentage covers my gas and wear and tear on my car. If the items are not returned within two weeks of the wedding, I keep the deposit.
If the final check has not arrived a week before the wedding, I think that it is a good idea to call the bride to let her know you are going to need cash on the day of the wedding. A simple phone call can relieve a lot of embarrassment and confusion on the day of delivery. The bride can leave the cash with the person who is to sign for the cake.
PRICING THE CAKE
Obviously, pricing varies depending on the area in which you live. Call around the area to find out what others are charging. Be sure to check your local bakeries, independent bakers and grocery stores, just so you know what you're up against.
In some areas, people are getting as little as $.75 per slice, in other areas pricing starts at about $1.85 per slice and goes up from there. Don't underprice yourself. You are spending a lot of time on this cake and you need to be paid for your time and talent. In my area I would say most people charge by the slice. Also, I figure that every time I have to go around the cake with a tip, the price goes up a few cents per slice.
If a bride wants a cake for 150 people, and your pans either make 143 or 161 slices, don't just charge her for 150 and make the 161 size. Offer her a choice, then let her pay for the cake she chooses.
Allow a minimum of two inches between cake sizes. I think that four inches looks the best, but two will suffice. Also, be careful to consider symmetry. You probably don't want a stacked cake with a bottom layer of 14", a middle layer of 8", and a top 6". Just consider how it will look stacked. I usually set up the look of the cakes with empty cake pans turned upside down for the brides. If you need more cake than what the bride needs to get the look you want, then tell her. You are the professional and know what will look good and what won't.
Sometimes, part or all of a given cake will be a "dummy" -- for appearances only. I have found that most people charge about the same price for a dummy as for cake. You are still using the same icing and the same time decorating. Also, you have the expense of the dummy itself.
I've asked all around the country, and it seems that carrot cake is a minimum of $.50 per slice more than regular cake. Some people have a basic (white) price, then go up as the flavor requires.
Flower prices depend on the type, royal or gumpaste. Some people charge per spray, others figure it into the cost of the cake per slice. You have to decide what you want to do. Get a system, write it down, then stick to it. Generally, fillings run from $.05 per slice to $1.50 per slice for liqueur flavors, or more, depending on the ingredients and time required.
Rolled buttercream or fondant cakes are much more expensive than regular butter cream cakes. In asking around the country at shows, the least expensive cake of this type I have found is $2.50 per slice. There are places in Maryland and New York where they are getting $8.50 plus per slice for fondant cakes
You ask, "How do I break into the more expensive cakes?" Make dummies of both, then offer the brides a choice. If your more expensive cake looks more elegant and that is her wish, more often than not, she will be willing to pay for it.
ON YOUR WAY TO THE RECEPTION
I use carpet foam under the cake tiers to transport the cake It helps absorb any bumps in the car or van. It will prevent a lot of repairs at the reception site. (But if it's too thick, you may chance the cake tipping on the way.) I also cover the foam with a clean white sheet. In case of an accident, heaven forbid, at least the cake would be clean for repairs. If you can't get foam, use the grid-like grip mats for carpets to prevent the cakes from shifting. Some people use boxes to transport wedding cakes. I don't because I feel they can enhance accidents rather than prevent them (for example, putting fingers or flaps into the cake when removing the cake).
A sign for the car, "WEDDING CAKE IN TRANSPORT" is nice. It can keep motorists from tailgating. The sign should be big enough that they don't have to get close to see it, but not obstructing your view. Also, place is so that it cannot drop onto the cake in transport.
When rounding corners, my advice is to creep. You may also want to turn on your flashers to warn other motorists that you are going slowly. Also, leave yourself enough time that you don't have to rush. Sudden starts and stops can find a wedding cake inches off of its plate by the time you get where you are going.
On warm days, ensure that your air conditioning is working and turn it up so that the car is cool. Avoid having the cake sitting in a hot car for any length of time. If the delivery is to be made to an unairconditioned hall, don't get there too early. Also, don't cover the cake with plastic wrap for any length of time as it will make the cake too moist and soggy.
Be sure to take your camera and flash to take pictures after you've set up the cake. Pictures are nice for portfolios later. I also like to get double prints so I can send the bride a picture of her cake. (Many times the photographer's cake pictures include the entire cake table, including skirt and all you can see is the outline of the cake. Mine are a lot more detailed.)
Take icing, bags, any tips you used on the cake, and a spatula for any repairs. Check your supplies and put them in a bag or box. Do you need an extension cord for the fountain? If so, pack it ahead of time.
I always make a one page list for the hotel or reception caterers of what I need returned. This helps them to make sure I get back what I am expecting and the bride does not get charged. (Netting/tulle is washable and reusable.) I may also leave a cake cutting guide if there is a family member cutting the cake. Provide the bride with a box for her top tier. This is usually left under the cake cutting table.
Do you have the topper? Don't forget it if the bride has provided you one ahead of time. Also, are there ribbons or extras you need to take for in between the tiers, on pillars, etc.? A shopping bag is a nice carrier for these items.
SET UP AT THE RECEPTION SITE
My first suggestion is INSIST ON IT!!! Once you accept money for a wedding cake you are a professional. If the cake does not make it to the reception in good condition, it reflects on you, even if you may have not transported it. My experience in the past has been that even if I did not transport it, I ended up repairing it at the site anyway, so go ahead and charge for delivery and set up. I use a flat fee for certain areas, others have a fee per mile. (Don't forget you have to get home, too, so charge for that as well. It's your time and gas).
Before you go into the site with the big cake, check out the table, its position, readiness for the cake, etc. Insist that the cake NOT BE MOVED once you set it up. My favorite thing to do under a cake is to "cloud" the table with an extra table cloth as shown in the photo. Most hotels will provide this to you at no extra charge. Bunch the cloth to look like a cloud, leaving it flat in the center where the cake will be. This is an inexpensive way to fancy the cake without a whole lot of fuss.
When transporting the cake from the car to the reception room, use common sense. If you use a cart for this purpose, it should be sturdy enough not to collapse when it hits a bump. Obviously, your cake will go with it. Also, when taking a cart over the bumps between rooms, lift- DO NOT ROLL- both the front and the back wheels. This will prevent the cake from flying off the cart.
Give yourself enough time to set up the cake, but not too much time that something could happen to the cake. (I remember seeing a wedding cake that was delivered in the morning for an afternoon wedding...still in a box. During the day, someone put their fingers into the cake.
It may be a good idea to contact the florist ahead of time. I prefer small flowers over large so as not to overpower a cake. If you ask for rosebuds, make sure that you get sweetheart rosebuds, otherwise you may be in for a big surprise. Usually the florist will leave the flowers in a box for you to place on the cake.
Once the cake is delivered and set up properly, get your designated contact person to sign the acceptance line at the bottom of the contract. At this point that person takes responsibility for the cake. If there is a question as to its proper delivery you have a name and signature which could prevent problems for you later.
I have found that wedding cakes are much more profitable than birthday or anniversary cakes. If you have never done a tiered cake before, it might be wise to take a class. Many programs offer classes in tiered/wedding cake construction, so you can practice before you have to do the real thing. I was more nervous for my first wedding cake than I was for my own wedding, but now they are not a big deal.
Know what you are doing and both you and the bride will be happy.
Lace Embossing: Delicate lace patterns for wedding cake
Delicate lace patterns make a beautiful addition to wedding or special occasion cakes. In this feature, Diane Gibbs, a well-known member of the Maryland cake decorating community shows us how to create an embossed lace effect on a buttercream-iced cake.
You Will Need:
For transfer method, add:
When choosing your design, use a heavier type of embroidered or crocheted lace rather than thin nylon lace for best results. Laces that are used for bridal gowns work the best, but can be very expensive. You can economize however, by buying a quarter of a yard and then repositioning the lace around your cake to complete the design instead of purchasing a larger, more expensive piece.
If you choose this route, cut the piece in a place that will make it easy to align, i.e. at the beginning of a pattern that is repeated.
For this cake, the lace was used to create a design, which encircled the cake on its side. You may also select from lace appliques and repeat the design or use it as a design for the top of the cake. The only limits are in your imagination.
Note, however, that whatever lace you choose, although it will be reusable on other cakes, will absorb oils and turn color in this process.
1. Begin by icing a cake with buttercream icing. Smooth the texture of your cake by using a knife, which has been warmed in hot water, or gently pressing a paper towel into the surface of the icing. If you use the hot knife method, be careful not to get water drops on the icing as it may cause the lace to stick.
2. Lace embossing must be done on a freshly iced cake before the icing has had a chance to crust over. Position the lace on the cake, and insert toothpicks to hold it in place. Gently rub the lace with a paper towel or plain piece of paper, pressing the surface of the icing to create the embossing. Take it easy-if you apply too much pressure the embossing will be too deep. And you could have trouble removing the lace or create extra work for yourself in the next step.
3. Remove the toothpicks and gently pull the lace off the cake. If you are using a small piece of lace that does not go completely around the cake, you must remove the entire piece and reposition it to complete the embossing. It will take some effort to make sure the pattern lines up each time you reposition. Move quickly from one section to the next so that the icing will not crust over. If a seam results, be sure to place that point at the back of the cake.
4. Smooth over any holes that may have been left by the toothpicks.
5. Using buttercream icing with a small tip such as a #1 or #01, pipe over the embossing lace design, filling in the depressions. It helps to have the piece of lace next to your work area so that you can refer to it as you go. The piping can be done in the same color as the cake icing, or you can use a contrasting color.
6. After you have filled the entire design, you can overpipe to create a raised look, outline the design, or add colored highlights to achieve your desired effect.
Alternative Transfer Method
If you are using a cake with straight sides (rectangular, square, hexagonal, etc.), you may transfer your lace pattern in royal icing. This is a good alternative of you want to use a particular design, but don't want to ruin a piece of antique lace, for example. Or you might just like the effect! Here's how:
A. Trace the lace design on tracing paper with a pencil, or place the lace on a photocopier and adjust the darkness or lightness to have it reproduce on the paper.
B. Measure each side of your cake and transfer those measurements to the paper design.
C. Place the pattern on a very sturdy, flat surface such as glass or hard plastic, and tape a piece or wax paper on top of it. Using a very small (#1 or #01) tip, pipe the lace design onto the waxed paper with royal icing in appropriate lengths for each side of your cake. Let dry completely.
D. Carefully peel the waxed paper away from the royal icing lace.
E. Attach the icing lace to your cake with small dots of royal icing. Seal any edges with icing and add borders as desired. You can see that this technique will only work with small lace pieces or on a cake with straight sides so the lace can lie flat.
You Will Need:
- yard or more or lace toothpicks
- Piping bag and #1 or #01 tip
- Buttercream icing
- Coloring as desired
For transfer method, add:
- Royal icing
- Glass or other sturdy surface
- Wax paper
- Tape
When choosing your design, use a heavier type of embroidered or crocheted lace rather than thin nylon lace for best results. Laces that are used for bridal gowns work the best, but can be very expensive. You can economize however, by buying a quarter of a yard and then repositioning the lace around your cake to complete the design instead of purchasing a larger, more expensive piece.
If you choose this route, cut the piece in a place that will make it easy to align, i.e. at the beginning of a pattern that is repeated.
For this cake, the lace was used to create a design, which encircled the cake on its side. You may also select from lace appliques and repeat the design or use it as a design for the top of the cake. The only limits are in your imagination.
Note, however, that whatever lace you choose, although it will be reusable on other cakes, will absorb oils and turn color in this process.
1. Begin by icing a cake with buttercream icing. Smooth the texture of your cake by using a knife, which has been warmed in hot water, or gently pressing a paper towel into the surface of the icing. If you use the hot knife method, be careful not to get water drops on the icing as it may cause the lace to stick.
2. Lace embossing must be done on a freshly iced cake before the icing has had a chance to crust over. Position the lace on the cake, and insert toothpicks to hold it in place. Gently rub the lace with a paper towel or plain piece of paper, pressing the surface of the icing to create the embossing. Take it easy-if you apply too much pressure the embossing will be too deep. And you could have trouble removing the lace or create extra work for yourself in the next step.
3. Remove the toothpicks and gently pull the lace off the cake. If you are using a small piece of lace that does not go completely around the cake, you must remove the entire piece and reposition it to complete the embossing. It will take some effort to make sure the pattern lines up each time you reposition. Move quickly from one section to the next so that the icing will not crust over. If a seam results, be sure to place that point at the back of the cake.
4. Smooth over any holes that may have been left by the toothpicks.
5. Using buttercream icing with a small tip such as a #1 or #01, pipe over the embossing lace design, filling in the depressions. It helps to have the piece of lace next to your work area so that you can refer to it as you go. The piping can be done in the same color as the cake icing, or you can use a contrasting color.
6. After you have filled the entire design, you can overpipe to create a raised look, outline the design, or add colored highlights to achieve your desired effect.
Alternative Transfer Method
If you are using a cake with straight sides (rectangular, square, hexagonal, etc.), you may transfer your lace pattern in royal icing. This is a good alternative of you want to use a particular design, but don't want to ruin a piece of antique lace, for example. Or you might just like the effect! Here's how:
A. Trace the lace design on tracing paper with a pencil, or place the lace on a photocopier and adjust the darkness or lightness to have it reproduce on the paper.
B. Measure each side of your cake and transfer those measurements to the paper design.
C. Place the pattern on a very sturdy, flat surface such as glass or hard plastic, and tape a piece or wax paper on top of it. Using a very small (#1 or #01) tip, pipe the lace design onto the waxed paper with royal icing in appropriate lengths for each side of your cake. Let dry completely.
D. Carefully peel the waxed paper away from the royal icing lace.
E. Attach the icing lace to your cake with small dots of royal icing. Seal any edges with icing and add borders as desired. You can see that this technique will only work with small lace pieces or on a cake with straight sides so the lace can lie flat.
Basic Skill: Icing A Cake
This month's basic skill is fundamental to a beautiful decorated cake - a properly iced foundation! If you are a true beginner, this will get you off to a great start without any bad habits. More advanced people might enjoy a refresher, or want to refine their technique for a truly polished look.
Francie Snodgrass of Virginia has been decorating cakes for 25 years, beginning with her second child's second birthday cake. As a youngster, Francie never had a birthday cake so as an adult she decided to make sure her kids had those special cakes. These days she owns two shops where she sells cake decorating supplies, teaches classes, and creates many custom cakes.
Prepare Your Cake:
Prepare Your Icing-The Basic Rules:
2 lb. confectionery (powdered) sugar
2 tsp. clear vanilla
2 tsp. butter flavoring
2 tsp. almond extract or other flavor
1/3 cup water (less 2-3 Tbs. for stiff)
Buttercream Icing1/2 lb. (1 cup) solid shortening
1/2 lb. (1 cup) butter or margarine (not spreads or soft margarine)
2 lb. Confectionery (powdered) sugar
2 tsp. clear vanilla
2 tsp. almond flavoring (optional, or use another flavor)
1/3 cup less 2 Tbs. water
Smoothing The Icing
Round Cakes
Francie Snodgrass of Virginia has been decorating cakes for 25 years, beginning with her second child's second birthday cake. As a youngster, Francie never had a birthday cake so as an adult she decided to make sure her kids had those special cakes. These days she owns two shops where she sells cake decorating supplies, teaches classes, and creates many custom cakes.
Prepare Your Cake:
Be sure your board is sturdy enough to support your cake. If not, your cake could crack. Cover your board neatly with wax or other greaseproof paper suitable for contact with food. Level your cake layers using a knife or leveling tool and place the first layer cut side down on the board.
Prepare Your Icing-The Basic Rules:
1. Any icing will work, but it must be SMOOTH (not full of air pockets), LIGHT (fluffy without having large air pockets), and have a THIN CONSISTENCY for icing the cake. Use medium or still consistency icing for decorating.
2. Beat the icing using the mixer's 'paddle' rather than the wire whisk, at the lowest speed your mixer can handle, for at least ten minutes. Be careful not to overheat your mixer's motor
3. Always make and use more icing than you think you'll need. In a K-5 Kitchen Aid mixer, a four pound recipe mixes best. Smaller batches will mix in more air.
4. When possible, weigh rather than measure ingredients. This will assure that each batch of icing is the same.
5. Use water instead of milk for the main liquid. That way you can reuse your icing.
You can frost almost ANYTHING with almost ANYTHING as long as you keep the above rules in mind. If it looks, feels and acts like frosting, it will frost something.
The following recipes are the ones I use most often for working on cakes. By all means, work with what you like, just try to make it SMOOTH, LIGHT, and THIN!
White "Butter" Cream Icing
1lb. (2 cups) solid shortening (or 1-3/4 cups shortening + 1/2 cup butter)2 lb. confectionery (powdered) sugar
2 tsp. clear vanilla
2 tsp. butter flavoring
2 tsp. almond extract or other flavor
1/3 cup water (less 2-3 Tbs. for stiff)
Place ingredients in mixing bowl in the order indicated. Mix for two minutes, then scrape the bowl to remove shortening or butter from the sides and bottom of the bowl. Continue mixing at low speed for approximately ten minutes. When the icing is ready, it will take on a satiny shine.
Buttercream Icing1/2 lb. (1 cup) solid shortening
1/2 lb. (1 cup) butter or margarine (not spreads or soft margarine)
2 lb. Confectionery (powdered) sugar
2 tsp. clear vanilla
2 tsp. almond flavoring (optional, or use another flavor)
1/3 cup less 2 Tbs. water
Mix as for White 'Butter' Cream above. Note that butter will yield a whiter icing than margarine.
NOTE: In hot and/or humid weather, it helps to add 2 tablespoons or meringue powder to both of the above recipes. Each recipe yields enough to frost a two layer 9x13" cake.
Icing The Rectangular Cake
Mark points midway up the sides of a 9x13' rectangular cake. Slice in half using a long knife as shown. Remove top of cake and set aside.Using a decorating bag with or without a large round tip, pipe a thick icing 'dam' around the top edge of the bottom layer. The dam will prevent filling from squeezing out and will help level the cake. Spread the filling of you choice (packaged chocolate mousse, chocolate pudding, fruit, etc.) inside of the dam with a spoon, knife, or spatula.
Gently place the top layer, cut side down, onto the filled bottom layer. Place a small amount of icing in a separate container for the crumb layer. The crumb layer will prevent the bulk of the icing from being contaminated with crumbs.
Using the separated crumb layer icing, rock the spatula back and forth to cover the cake with a thin, even coat of icing. Turn the spatula perpendicular to the iced surface of the cake before putting it away. Avoid touching the cake with the spatula. This method will seal the cake and any loose crumbs, while minimizing the amount of crumbs picked up by the spatula. Start with the sides, and then move on to the top. Allow the crumb coat to dry for at least 20 minutes (but up to three days if you wish) before proceeding.
Moving back to the main bowl, and using a clean spatula, place a generous amount of icing on the side of the cake, near, but not on a corner. Always move the spatula from icing to icing, never allowing the spatula to actually touch the cake.
Keeping the spatula flat, pull the large 'glob' of icing along the side of the cake, away from the first corner. As the icing layer thins, get some more. The important thing is to keep the icing ahead of the spatula. Don't worry about making it perfectly smooth yet; just get the icing on the cake.
When you reach a corner, place a large amount of icing on each side of the corner, the two 'globes' butting up directly on the corner itself. Next, pull the icing away in each direction to create a sharp edge. Remember, always use more icing than you think you'll need. If you use too little icing, you can get crumbs or the cake can show through. The icing should come up above the top of the cake on the sides.
Spread icing on the top of the cake using the flat portion of the spatula. Work the icing to the edges of the cake. Use the spatula to create a sharp edge with the icing that was sticking up from the cake's sides.
NOTE: Be careful not to scrape into the well of your mixing bowl where unmixed ingredients may lie.
Smoothing The Icing
There are many ways to smooth icing, but nothing beats learning to handle a spatula. Hold the spatula at an angle to the cake, using the edge to even out the cake's surfaces. Dragging the edge of a ruler across the whole top surface also works well, as shown. If necessary, finish the look using any of the following methods:
Hot Water Method: Dip a spatula of knife frequently in hot water. The heat and moisture will melt the buttercream into a smooth surface.
Paper Towel Method: Gently apply a paper towel (check the texture first) to slightly crusted icing.
Smooth Paper Method: Gently rub any smooth paper onto slightly crusted icing.
Non-Woven Interfacing Method: Gently apply interfacing to surface of crusted icing.
NOTE: 'Crusting' will usually occur in 15-20 minutes depending on the temperature and humidity. To judge if the icing has crusted, remember that if it sticks to your finger, it will stick to your smoothing paper, so it has not crusted yet.
Round Cakes
Round cakes are easier to frost because you don't have to worry about corners. The technique is similar to that for rectangular cakes, but because of the shape and size of the cake, the icing 'dam' works more as a leveling tool than as a sealant.
If you are filling with your icing, you can use a slightly different technique from that shown above. Generously fill the layer. Don't worry about going over the sides. Pipe a 'dam' around the circumference of the cake. Place the top layer on the bottom layer.
Move two rulers around the cake, positioning them at perpendicular angles, to measure and adjust the cake so that it is the same height everywhere. One ruler rests across the top of the cake, the other will measure the height.
Simply press the top layer into the bottom in any spots that are too tall, allowing the icing from the 'dam' to squeeze out the sides.
Once the cake is even, place a large amount of icing on the side of the cake, and push the 'blob' around the side of the cake without letting your spatula touch the cake. Always apply icing to icing.
Finish as described above for rectangular cakes.
The Lambeth: old cake decorating technique
Joseph A. Lambeth began winning awards for cake decorating as early as 1911 in England. He went on to win competitions as an American citizen in the 1920s. As a recognized master, teacher, and author in the field, his work became well known throughout the world.
Linda Dobson, as established Maryland cake artist, demonstrates her 'quick' version of this incredible art for us. She has described the technique as 'elegant, intricate, Victorian, Baroque, three-dimensional, and time consuming but rewarding.'
Note: You will see that this technique requires many layers of overpiping, and each application should be left to dry before proceeding. Use this time as an opportunity to move on to another step.
You Will Need:
A cake circle or board at least four inches larger than the cake and lots of extremely smooth icing. You should prepare gumpaste roses and daffodils ahead of time.
It is very important to ice the cake with a crumb coating. It will be of particular value, not only for its sealing function, but because it will provide a surface for etching guidelines.
The top edges of Lambeth cakes are beveled at 45 degrees. To create that bevel, measure 1/2 inch in from the sides across the top of the cake to mark an inner circle. This can easily be accomplished by first cutting a wax paper circle one inch smaller in diameter than your cake - an 11 ' circle for a 12 ' cake, for example. Trace the circumference of inner circle into the crumb layer with a toothpick.
You must also measure 1/2 inch from the top of the cake down its side, and mark that line all the way around the cake. You can do this, and other side markings by placing the cake on a turntable. Mark a single spot at the correct height, then securely rest a skewer at the spot while slowly turning the cake.
Step 1-2:
Use a sharp knife to create the bevel by cutting off the top edge of the cake along a straight line between the two marked circles. With the knife at a 45 degree angle, use the upper part of the blade to cut along the top circle, and the lower part of the blade to follow the side circle. Crumb coat the exposed area created by the bevel. Allow the crumb coat to dry. Apply the final coating of icing.
Step 3:
From the base of the cake, measure and mark a spot 1/2 ' up the side. Use the turntable technique discussed above to create an even line around the perimeter of the cake.
Step 4-5:
Create a 'ramp' of icing from the marked line to the edge of your cake board with an angles spatula. This can best be accomplished by tilting the cake slightly upward. You are now ready to begin decorating.
Step 6:
Begin with a #199 decorating tube and medium to stiff consistency icing. Pipe a large shell border in the bevel around the top of the cake. Allow this, like every other application, to crust over before proceeding.
Step 7:
With a #16 tube, pipe a 'C' on each shell, keeping the inward curl of the 'C' in the top center of the shell, and the tail ending at the point where each shell meets the next. Allow to dry. Overpipe each 'C' with each of: #14, 13, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 tips, in that order. Allow each to dry before proceeding. Return later to finish with the tube #1 overpipe.
Step 8:
Using tube #14 pipe a scallop immediately below each shell. Overpipe each scallop with tubes #13, 4, 3, 2, and 1. Then, with tube #13, pipe a second row of scallops just below the first. Overpipe with tubes #3 and #2. Allow to dry thoroughly, and return later to finish with a #1 overpipe.
Step 9:
Pipe a scallop directly above each shell with a #14 tip. Then, with a #13 tube, pipe a second row immediately above the first.
Step 10-11:
On the 'ramp', create a basket weave using tubes #5 and #48. Mark the ramp in fourths around the cake, and pipe the basket weave in every other section. Use tube #5 for the straight lines extending outward from the cake. 'Weave' with the #48 tube. As you lay each set of #48 weaves across the #5 lines, note that to avoid gaps, the distance between the weaves should be no more than the width of the tip.
Finish the side edges of the basket weave and the inner edge of the 'ramp' with a simple #14 shell.
Above and below each shell at the base of the cake, pipe a #357 leaf extending up the side of the cake, and one going down the 'ramp'.
For the side trim, mark a line around the cake using the 'skewer' method described above. Then with a #103 rose tip, place the tip at a 45 degree angle to the cake and pipe out one petal. Turn tube opposite direction and beginning slightly behind the first petal, pipe another at a 45 degree angle. Using a criss-cross motion, work this fashion around the cake.
Fill a pastry bag with both green and pink icing. In the smooth ramp sections, pipe stems with a #3 tip and leaves with a #357 tip. This will create a beautiful two-color effect.
Step 12:
Arrange soft yellow and blush pink gum paste roses and buds and yellow daffodils with the stems and leaves. Add additional leaves as necessary. Finish the outer edge of the cake board with a #14 shell.
Step 13:
Create stems and leaves, and place gumpaste buds on the top of the cake.
Step 14:
Now is a good time to go back and add a #1 tip roping in an accent color to each top scallop. You can also add beadwork behind each scallop in piping gel using the same accent color.
Step 15:
Place gumpaste flowers to the top of the cake. Finish each side scallop with #1 strings in your accent color.
Step 16:
Add your #1 tip accents to the 'C's as described in step #7.
Wedding Cake Basics and A Basic Wedding Cake (Part I)
In this post we will present a comprehensive look at the basics of wedding cakes: from the history, to contracting, to basic construction, and decorating.
Obviously, there are many more "tricks of the trade", more difficult designs, and more complicated cake styles. The aim here is to get you started. After that, you, as the cake decorator must use the tools of the trade and your own expertise to create your desired look.
This first installment will cover a brief history, and then the planning and creation of a basic wedding cake. Next time, we'll look at some of the more practical considerations -- business (contracts, pricing, etc.), transportation, and set-up concerns.
HISTORY
The Ancient Romans crumbled barley cake over brides' heads to invoke the fertility powers of Jupiter. In the Middle Ages, small sweet rolls were piled between the bride and groom. If they were able to kiss over the mound they would have many children and prosperity.
Icing came later. Originally, cakes were covered in lard to keep them moist. It was scraped off just before the wedding. In later years, sugar was added to improve the taste. Voila! decorator's icing.
And just where do groom's cakes fit in? Traditionally they were cut in wedding cake sized pieces and boxed. Single girls placed them under their pillows to dream on.
In yesteryear, groom's cakes were usually fruit cake (which did not have to be refrigerated) or chocolate, and many times the same size as the wedding cake. In modern times, primarily spurred by the movie, Steel Magnolias (which had an armadillo for a grooms cake), they now often relate to the groom's hobbies. You'll find groom's cakes in the shape of a sailboat, dog, boots, fish, etc.
MEETING WITH THE BRIDE
Prior to scheduling a meeting with the bride, ensure that you have the date of the bride's wedding open on your calendar. There is no use wasting precious time only to find out that you have some other commitment.
When you meet with the bride, ask the following questions:
How many guests will be fed?
What colors will be used, if any, on the cake?
Does she want a stacked cake or a pillared cake?
Does she want 5", 3", or 2" between tiers?
Does she want "traditional" pillars, or a special cake stand?
What kind of flowers will be put on the cake, if any? (Silk, frosting, fresh, gumpaste)
Especially for a smaller wedding cake, does she want a fountain or stairs? Fountains and stairs raise the cake higher, so it can be seen more easily.
What flavor cake does she want?
Does she want a filling?
Does she want the cake stacked or tiered with pillars?
What does she plan on putting between layers if it is pillared?
Does she want anything, such as ribbon, decorating between the pillars?
Who is the point of contact who will sign for the cake when it is delivered?
Where is the reception?
Does she want some type of material such as toule or lace under the cake to add "fantasy" to the occasion? Candelabra or other decorations may also be placed next to the cake for a styled look.
Be prepared to answer some of the brides questions as well:
Are the cakes fresh or frozen? Is there a delivery charge? Are there any "hidden charges", such as the cost of the pillars? Must the bride buy the pillars and plates, or is there a deposit on them?
If the wedding reception is in a hotel, the bride also needs to find out if the hotel will charge her for cutting the cake. (In my area just cake cutting ranges from $1.25-$2.50 per slice. That charge does not include the cake!
PLANNING THE CAKE
Once the contract is signed (tune in next issue for contracting tips), put the date and time on your calendar. This is very important unless you have another type of tickler you can use. You do not want to miss a wedding date.
Ensure you have all of your ingredients before you start baking. If you are using a cream cheese icing, make sure you include the cream cheese in your ingredient list at the store, or you may find yourself making a separate trip.
Icing flowers can be done well ahead of time, whether they are from royal icing or gumpaste. Be careful if you plan to use purple flowers. If the cake is in the sun for any length of time (even through a window), the purple flowers might turn blue. You might want to test out your color in advance at home.
Check your plate sizes and pillars to be sure that you will have everything necessary for that particular cake. Just because you have a certain size doesn't mean you won't use them the week prior on another wedding cake. They might not be returned in time for you to use them again. Also check your supply of fabric trims (ruffles, netting, etc.) for the bottom of the cake; doweling; and extras such as pearls, plastics, and 6" cardboard circles for saving the top tier of the cake.
Make sure that you have the correct size pans in which to bake the cake. Consider what you will use for the bottom base of the cake, a separator plate, plywood, or other material, and be sure to have it on hand.
Most fresh cakes can be baked two to three days in advance. Some people freeze their wedding tiers, but I prefer to use unfrozen layers.
CONSTRUCTING AND DECORATING THE CAKE
I often smooth my wedding cakes with a pillow case. It works just like paper toweling, but gives a smooth appearance. That way, if I need to do any repairs at the wedding reception site, I don't have to match the paper toweling design. If repairs need to be done, I use the knife in hot water technique- it works just fine.
After you ice all of the tiers, place each (except the bottom) on an appropriate sized separator plate.
Dowels or other support MUST be used for wedding cakes (or any tiered cake). I cut mine with a very sharp, sturdy serrated knife. People have told me to use wire cutters and the like, but I find they pinch the dowel; I want the surface to stay round, rather than flattening.
As you cut each dowel, always use the one you stick into the highest part of the cake to measure the others you will cut. This way the dowels won't get longer and longer as you go. Make sure that the dowels are all exactly the same size. Also, rocking can be prevented by using an odd number of dowels. Use at least five. On any cake bigger than 12 inches, use seven. Each tier's dowels must be cut separately, as most cakes are not exactly the same height all around. Push the dowels into the cake all the way to the bottom plate. Do not use cardboard plates in between cake tiers except for the top 6" layer, as the dowels may puncture the cardboard under the heavier tiers causing the cake to become unstable.)
When you place the dowels, put them far enough toward the outer edges of the cake that they will lend support, but ensure they are under the cake plate that will be sitting on them. I've heard of at least one disaster because the decorator put the dowels in too close to the center of the cake.
When you begin stacking the tiers, work from the bottom up. Many people use the coconut method (putting coconut between the tiers), but I have found that not everyone likes coconut. I prefer to use parchment paper. Cut the paper approximately the size of the cake going on top. Make sure to cut spaces for "legs" of separator plates. Then put the parchment on top of the lower cake. I have found this method to be better at not picking up frosting from the bottom tier than the coconut method.
Next, line up the cakes evenly from above and quickly pull out your fingers, letting the cake above "fall" (just a finger's space worth) onto the cake below. Now pipe on a border at the bottom of the top cake to help prevent shifting.
If the cake is a stacked one, I usually insert a dowel from the top all the way to the bottom. You can make holes in the middle of plastic plates with a large drill bit to accommodate the dowels. This will prevent major shifts during transportation.
At this point, separator plates should be placed on any tiers which will support pillars. Now you're ready to begin decorating!
On the cake shown, I decorated the sides of the cake with a striped garland. I began by marking the location with a garland marker, but you could also tear strips from plastic wrap (fold them and mold them to the size you need) or a paper cup cut in half. Whenever possible, put the cake at eye level when marking to assure evenness.
Stack the cake before you decorate. You will achieve much more uniform decorations this way. Even 1/2 inch misalignment will often be noticeable. If you are using pillars, mark the cake then take off the pillars before you decorate. The final assembly of the tiers with the pillars will take place at the reception site.
Once I was ready to begin decorating this cake, I "striped" my decorating bag placing colored icing on one side of the bag, and a larger amount of white icing on the opposite side. Squeeze some of the icing out until the stripes are consistent. It may take some practice to create an even distribution all the way through the bag.
Next, using an open tip such as a #45, pipe the garland using an overlapping back and forth motion as you work around the marked scalloped shape. Finish the top edges with a scroll or other decorative border of your choice.
I also piped a border around the edge of the plastic pillar support plates.
To finish the look, insert a ruffle at the bottom edge of the cake using a knife.
Add your flowers under the pillars, but if you use fresh flowers as decorations, do not put the stems directly into or onto the cake. You can obtain individual flower holders from a floral supply shop. Some flowers are poisonous when eaten, so be careful which ones you use!
HINT: For special effects such as embroidery or cornelli work, you may wish to thin your buttercream icing by adding a small amount of corn syrup. It makes a smoother icing that will pipe easily.
Obviously, there are many more "tricks of the trade", more difficult designs, and more complicated cake styles. The aim here is to get you started. After that, you, as the cake decorator must use the tools of the trade and your own expertise to create your desired look.
This first installment will cover a brief history, and then the planning and creation of a basic wedding cake. Next time, we'll look at some of the more practical considerations -- business (contracts, pricing, etc.), transportation, and set-up concerns.
HISTORY
The Ancient Romans crumbled barley cake over brides' heads to invoke the fertility powers of Jupiter. In the Middle Ages, small sweet rolls were piled between the bride and groom. If they were able to kiss over the mound they would have many children and prosperity.
Icing came later. Originally, cakes were covered in lard to keep them moist. It was scraped off just before the wedding. In later years, sugar was added to improve the taste. Voila! decorator's icing.
And just where do groom's cakes fit in? Traditionally they were cut in wedding cake sized pieces and boxed. Single girls placed them under their pillows to dream on.
In yesteryear, groom's cakes were usually fruit cake (which did not have to be refrigerated) or chocolate, and many times the same size as the wedding cake. In modern times, primarily spurred by the movie, Steel Magnolias (which had an armadillo for a grooms cake), they now often relate to the groom's hobbies. You'll find groom's cakes in the shape of a sailboat, dog, boots, fish, etc.
MEETING WITH THE BRIDE
Prior to scheduling a meeting with the bride, ensure that you have the date of the bride's wedding open on your calendar. There is no use wasting precious time only to find out that you have some other commitment.
When you meet with the bride, ask the following questions:
How many guests will be fed?
What colors will be used, if any, on the cake?
Does she want a stacked cake or a pillared cake?
Does she want 5", 3", or 2" between tiers?
Does she want "traditional" pillars, or a special cake stand?
What kind of flowers will be put on the cake, if any? (Silk, frosting, fresh, gumpaste)
Especially for a smaller wedding cake, does she want a fountain or stairs? Fountains and stairs raise the cake higher, so it can be seen more easily.
What flavor cake does she want?
Does she want a filling?
Does she want the cake stacked or tiered with pillars?
What does she plan on putting between layers if it is pillared?
Does she want anything, such as ribbon, decorating between the pillars?
Who is the point of contact who will sign for the cake when it is delivered?
Where is the reception?
Does she want some type of material such as toule or lace under the cake to add "fantasy" to the occasion? Candelabra or other decorations may also be placed next to the cake for a styled look.
Be prepared to answer some of the brides questions as well:
Are the cakes fresh or frozen? Is there a delivery charge? Are there any "hidden charges", such as the cost of the pillars? Must the bride buy the pillars and plates, or is there a deposit on them?
If the wedding reception is in a hotel, the bride also needs to find out if the hotel will charge her for cutting the cake. (In my area just cake cutting ranges from $1.25-$2.50 per slice. That charge does not include the cake!
PLANNING THE CAKE
Once the contract is signed (tune in next issue for contracting tips), put the date and time on your calendar. This is very important unless you have another type of tickler you can use. You do not want to miss a wedding date.
Ensure you have all of your ingredients before you start baking. If you are using a cream cheese icing, make sure you include the cream cheese in your ingredient list at the store, or you may find yourself making a separate trip.
Icing flowers can be done well ahead of time, whether they are from royal icing or gumpaste. Be careful if you plan to use purple flowers. If the cake is in the sun for any length of time (even through a window), the purple flowers might turn blue. You might want to test out your color in advance at home.
Check your plate sizes and pillars to be sure that you will have everything necessary for that particular cake. Just because you have a certain size doesn't mean you won't use them the week prior on another wedding cake. They might not be returned in time for you to use them again. Also check your supply of fabric trims (ruffles, netting, etc.) for the bottom of the cake; doweling; and extras such as pearls, plastics, and 6" cardboard circles for saving the top tier of the cake.
Make sure that you have the correct size pans in which to bake the cake. Consider what you will use for the bottom base of the cake, a separator plate, plywood, or other material, and be sure to have it on hand.
Most fresh cakes can be baked two to three days in advance. Some people freeze their wedding tiers, but I prefer to use unfrozen layers.
CONSTRUCTING AND DECORATING THE CAKE
I often smooth my wedding cakes with a pillow case. It works just like paper toweling, but gives a smooth appearance. That way, if I need to do any repairs at the wedding reception site, I don't have to match the paper toweling design. If repairs need to be done, I use the knife in hot water technique- it works just fine.
After you ice all of the tiers, place each (except the bottom) on an appropriate sized separator plate.
Dowels or other support MUST be used for wedding cakes (or any tiered cake). I cut mine with a very sharp, sturdy serrated knife. People have told me to use wire cutters and the like, but I find they pinch the dowel; I want the surface to stay round, rather than flattening.
As you cut each dowel, always use the one you stick into the highest part of the cake to measure the others you will cut. This way the dowels won't get longer and longer as you go. Make sure that the dowels are all exactly the same size. Also, rocking can be prevented by using an odd number of dowels. Use at least five. On any cake bigger than 12 inches, use seven. Each tier's dowels must be cut separately, as most cakes are not exactly the same height all around. Push the dowels into the cake all the way to the bottom plate. Do not use cardboard plates in between cake tiers except for the top 6" layer, as the dowels may puncture the cardboard under the heavier tiers causing the cake to become unstable.)
When you place the dowels, put them far enough toward the outer edges of the cake that they will lend support, but ensure they are under the cake plate that will be sitting on them. I've heard of at least one disaster because the decorator put the dowels in too close to the center of the cake.When you begin stacking the tiers, work from the bottom up. Many people use the coconut method (putting coconut between the tiers), but I have found that not everyone likes coconut. I prefer to use parchment paper. Cut the paper approximately the size of the cake going on top. Make sure to cut spaces for "legs" of separator plates. Then put the parchment on top of the lower cake. I have found this method to be better at not picking up frosting from the bottom tier than the coconut method.
Next, line up the cakes evenly from above and quickly pull out your fingers, letting the cake above "fall" (just a finger's space worth) onto the cake below. Now pipe on a border at the bottom of the top cake to help prevent shifting.If the cake is a stacked one, I usually insert a dowel from the top all the way to the bottom. You can make holes in the middle of plastic plates with a large drill bit to accommodate the dowels. This will prevent major shifts during transportation.
At this point, separator plates should be placed on any tiers which will support pillars. Now you're ready to begin decorating!
On the cake shown, I decorated the sides of the cake with a striped garland. I began by marking the location with a garland marker, but you could also tear strips from plastic wrap (fold them and mold them to the size you need) or a paper cup cut in half. Whenever possible, put the cake at eye level when marking to assure evenness.
Stack the cake before you decorate. You will achieve much more uniform decorations this way. Even 1/2 inch misalignment will often be noticeable. If you are using pillars, mark the cake then take off the pillars before you decorate. The final assembly of the tiers with the pillars will take place at the reception site.Once I was ready to begin decorating this cake, I "striped" my decorating bag placing colored icing on one side of the bag, and a larger amount of white icing on the opposite side. Squeeze some of the icing out until the stripes are consistent. It may take some practice to create an even distribution all the way through the bag.
Next, using an open tip such as a #45, pipe the garland using an overlapping back and forth motion as you work around the marked scalloped shape. Finish the top edges with a scroll or other decorative border of your choice.I also piped a border around the edge of the plastic pillar support plates.
To finish the look, insert a ruffle at the bottom edge of the cake using a knife.
Add your flowers under the pillars, but if you use fresh flowers as decorations, do not put the stems directly into or onto the cake. You can obtain individual flower holders from a floral supply shop. Some flowers are poisonous when eaten, so be careful which ones you use!HINT: For special effects such as embroidery or cornelli work, you may wish to thin your buttercream icing by adding a small amount of corn syrup. It makes a smoother icing that will pipe easily.
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